What happens in a woman’s body during a climax is very like what happens in your (male) body when you ejaculate. In other words, there’s a feeling of increasing excitement, building up to a point where everything ‘blows’ in a great blast of ecstasy.
Knowing how to finger a girl is important, guys, because you just never know when some woman is going to want a good fingering to orgasm. It could be anyone, from your friend’s mom or a hospital nurse; or, perhaps, even some movie star stuck in her trailer and bored out of her mind. Whatever the unbelievable situation, you have to be ready!
Kait Scalisi, a sexual and reproductive health educator, writer and consultant, is also a huge fan of toys like the We-Vibe Touch, as well as G-Spot toy Je Joue Uma and arousal oils like ON Arousal Oil, which she says brings blood flow to the vaginal area and makes it easier to become aroused and achieve orgasm.
The first question you always ask is whether she is able to get an orgasm at all, for example by masturbation. If the answer to this question is no, she must first learn how to get an orgasm. If the answer is yes, you can investigate how to get an orgasm when making love.
Many men find oral sex (also known as ‘blow jobs’) highly sensitive, so start gently and slowly and work up to a faster pace. You can experiment with different tongue, mouth and head movements to see what works best (but never use your teeth unless asked!).
Many women say that oral sex gives them more stimulation than penetration. So remember to take it easy and avoid being rough, especially to begin with. Look where you are going too. Gently part the outer lips of the vagina and look for the vaginal opening, and the hooded clitoris above it. These are the most pleasurable areas to stimulate, and are the key to giving the best head. Thrusting a tongue in and out of the vagina might feel good for a moment or two, but it won’t be enough to tip her over the edge.
The whole point of the article was not “help on sex tips.” The point of the article was “Ways to Help Her Have Orgasms.” It was in the title right after the number 6 and the key words were HELP and ORGASM.
While the article does not explicitly say this, and Hana can correct me if I’m wrong, part of the point of the first paragraph is that the stereotype that oral sex between a man and a women is centered around blow jobs is inaccurate, and that the sexual experience will be better for everyone if the oral pleasure flows both ways. Whether or not that position is true is left up to each couple, but the article seems to be addressing this specific dynamic that occurs between men and women. The line telling men to “get over themselves” and venture down south, if nothing else, states that some guys don’t consider orally pleasuring women a priority in the bedroom. Again, I don’t know if this is true or not, but I don’t think its fair to read this as saying that men are the only ones performing oral sex on women. The article is written to address a specific issue: that not enough guys will or do perform oral sex on women, and that doing the following will drive their girl into orgasm land. simply because it does not discuss all possible contexts for oral sex does not make it socially “unjust” or ignorant. The title is “A Guy’s Guide to Oral Sex” because that’s what the article is about, and thus seems properly worded enough.
Don’t just go barging in down there. Take your time, and make sure you are both feeling turned on before you venture south. If you aren’t used to giving head, don’t expect to bring her to a climax in seconds flat. And if you have bad stubble on your chin, forget it; no girl wants razor burns in such a sensitive place.
This doesn’t seem fair, because apart from the small of men who have psychological difficulties with sex and who cannot relax enough to ejaculate into their partner (delayed ejaculation), most males have no problem at all in climaxing during sexual intercourse.
This is a really great article on female orgasms! Don’t forget that it’s not a “problem” if you can’t climax without clitoris stimulation. The majority of women don’t have vaginal-only orgasms. It’s not weird, so don’t feel like you’re doing anything wrong with your girlfriend.
For more articles on sexual health, check out our sexual health section. Follow us on Facebook and Twitter for all the latest updates! For daily free health tips, sign up for our newsletter. And to join discussions on health topics of your choice, visit our forum.
Once you make it to her clit and vagina, gently lick all around. Direct stimulation can be too intense for some, so explore the surrounding area. Ask her where she likes to be touched. You don’t have to be rough with your mouth unless she wants you to. It’s always best to start off slow, unless she specifically requests otherwise. Some women do like it when you roughly use your tongue and mouth, but only do so if she asks.
Today I’m going to give you a series of basic techniques designed to give your beloved woman the very best in erotic, physical pleasure. In my experience, the clitoris is the most consistent source of orgasm for the majority of women. There are other ways to bring a woman to orgasm, of course, but this is where I encourage you to start.
Start slow, start up top. Kiss her, slowly, then firmly – but like you have all the time in the world. Trail kisses from her mouth along her jaw to her ear, maybe take her earlobe in between your teeth. Make your way along her neck, kissing and licking at the sensitive spots – behind her ear, her pulse points, in between her collarbones. Move down slowly, take your time at her breasts, suck at her nipples, touch and caress her boobs. You can squeeze them (gently, unless she’s into otherwise) or gently bite her nipples if she’s into that stuff (but check first). Detour back up to her lips and kiss her, you want to get her aroused before you even get anywhere close to her lower lips.
The reason? During intercourse (missionary, doggie, woman-on-top, whatever), the penis does not directly stimulate the clitoris, the organ responsible for women’s orgasms. Sexuality experts reassure couples that the woman’s inability to experience orgasm during intercourse is (1) very common, (2) no reflection on her sexual responsiveness, (3) no reflection on the man’s sexual technique, and (4) no reflection the woman’s feelings about the relationship. I agree.
It may be hidden, but that doesn’t mean you can’t stimulate it if you know what you’re doing. While still tonguing her clitoris, push one finger slowly into her vagina. Leave it until she seems comfortable. Add a second finger, but note that for some women this might be uncomfortable.
The best feeling in the world is when a guy takes his time down there and knows how to tease And eventually gets to the good part which is the fast flick of his tongue against a girl’s clit. Gosh… that feels so damn good And remember… if you can’t find her clit… you can just ask
You’ve gotta learn how to push her buttons… which is actually really easy when you know the techniques. There’s an awesome guide called Revolutionary Sex that shows you everything. Here’s the guide: Revolutionary Sex – Give Her The Best Orgasm of Her Life
(6) Take a vibrator to bed. Even if you do all of the above, some women still have trouble with orgasm, and need the intense stimulation only vibrators can provide. Today, one-third of American women own vibrators, but few couples include them in partner sex. Some men fear being “replaced.” Nonsense. Power tools don’t replace carpenters. They just get the job done more efficiently. Vibrators can’t kiss and cuddle, or make women laugh, or love them. They do just one thing, and some women need that one thing to have orgasms. Hold her close as you invite her to use the vibrator.
This is all good news for you. Because if you put even a little bit of effort into sorting out your approach and technique, you’ll set yourself miles ahead of the pack. When you’re through, she’ll be blissed out, panting and doe-eyed, looking at you like you’re an absolute rock star.
I agree with those who have said that the Hitachi Magic Wand isn’t a good starter vibrator. That thing has some torque, lemme tell you. I think the vibe might be a good idea, but starting off small might work better.
For reference, this seems to be a tl;dr of one chapter of “She Comes First”, aka “Cunnilingus for Dummies.” It’s fairly enlightening and, for lack of a better word, educational – basic technique, mindset, it goes over the basics and then some. If anything, it’ll give you ideas. Would recommend.
Indeed, women can often have another orgasm soon after their first; which is distinctly different to men, who have a refractory period, during which it is impossible for them to become sexually aroused again.
We’ve all heard whispers and rumors, but actually having multiple orgasms? Well, that’s on par with having hair like a Victoria’s Secret angel and a metabolism that can burn right through morning bagels. But sexperts are here to reassure us all that multiple orgasms really do exist and—even better—that we can all have them!
You may feel nervous before having oral sex – whether you’re giving it or receiving it. The best thing to do is to carry on communicating with your partner. Ask them to tell you what feels nice and let them know when you are enjoying something.
By contrast, 80 per cent of heterosexual women and 91 per cent of lesbians always or usually orgasm with a combination of genital stimulation, deep kissing and oral sex – but without vaginal sex. “To say that there needs to be some education I think is an understatement,” said Prof Lloyd.
2) Some woman have mindbogglingly specific things which need to happen before they can have an orgasm. A ritual almost. Certain things need to be done in a specific order combined with some specific fantasies. So try mixing things up. Experimenting is fun.
Michael Castleman’s articles are always well researched at the same time interesting.I found a few things that i dont know myself as a girl.I am humbled by the rich information found in this page not only in the original post but even in the comments left by few others.
The risk of HIV transmission from oral sex is very low. The main risks arise if the person receiving oral sex has an STI or sores on their genital area, or if the person giving oral sex has sores in their mouth or bleeding gums.
While TV and movies would have us believe that all women are walking around desperate to have someone go down on them, according to a somewhat recent Esquire poll, 10 percent of the women they talked to said they didn’t like receiving oral at all. And a whopping 44 percent of women said it could be “nice” every once in awhile. What gives?