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#7 Pay attention to her reaction. Most people find it hot to watch a girl’s reaction as she is fingered. But aside from this, watching her reaction tells if a particular movement of your fingers is actually pleasurable or not. This guides you for which type of fingering technique you need to sustain to be able to bring her to an orgasm.

For the former, it’s all about the deep spot, which is sometimes called the A-Spot. Basically you take you middle finger and go all the way back to her cervix. Using just the tip of your middle finger, you press the top of the cervix until she explodes. It works because the cervix contracts during the female orgasm, and so stimulating that contraction causes a very deep full body orgasm that she almost definitely hasn’t experienced before. This is also great for women who can come from the clit but not from penetration. Look up David Shade to learn more about this technique.  If that doesn’t work, hypnosis is the next step.

Read the answer Ella González wrote.  Your wife is a right person, she is a right female, she is completely normal, there is nothing wrong with her.  Sexual intercourse is probably not the optimum way to gratify a woman. It certainly can be fun

Don’t forget that by taking a little time with foreplay, women can have an orgasm before the intercourse has even begun. This then takes some of the pressure off how long the man needs to last for because we’re already satisfied.

There’s only one rule about anal stimulation and it’s “No surprises!” If your woman is up for some experimenting, then use your pinky finger to LIGHTLY penetrate her anus. Make sure your hand is sideways and, just to be safe, keep fingering her vagina at the same time you slip it in.

Deciding whether to have oral sex is a very personal thing. The main things to consider are whether it feels right, and whether you and your partner are both sure. Our article ‘Am I ready for sex?’ will help you think about this.

When this tender technique gets a teensy bit repetitive/bland, that’s when you should amp things up a bit. Experiment with how much pressure she enjoys, without taking it too far. How do you know if you’ve taken it too far? She’ll have kneed your head out her sanctuary by then. But for the most part, slowly rev things up and see how she reacts via her moans and hip movements.

The most widely used lube is saliva. It’s wet, free, and always available, but saliva dries quickly and it’s not very Vegetable oil is another possibility, but it can be messy and stain linens. Try commercial lubricants. They’re safe, inexpensive, and slippery. If they dry out, they can be refreshed with a few drops of water, or just apply a bit more. But don’t squirt lubricants directly on women’s genitals. That can feel cold and jarring. Squeeze some into your hand, rub it with your fingers to warm it, then touch her. Lubricants are available at pharmacies, near the condoms.

i have been looking up on this for a while as i feel really bad my wife can not orgasam during sex i would love to be able to find her g spot im really good with her clit as this is the only way she can cum. so i have set my self a little task as we are going to a ball this friday and im hoping to try this as she will feel a little more relaxed as she dosent like me fingering her so what i have learnd so far.

A great lover is a very good thing to be. Your partner will be more giving, and you’ll have more confidence meeting a new woman knowing that you can make her come. Giving great oral sex is the key to being a great lover, so get out there and try out these 8 tips and techniques. She’ll be glad you did, and so will you!

Men under 50 need to understand that it often takes women quite a while to become highly aroused, like 30 to 45 minutes. That’s why men should not jump into vaginal intercourse. They should allow women the time they need to become sufficiently aroused to actually enjoy intercourse. That’s why whole-body touching is so important. Touching women all over (not just their breast and between their legs) but everywhere from their scalp to their feet not only gives them the time they need to become highly aroused and ready for genital play, it also makes genital sex more enjoyable because whole-body arousal increases genital sensitivity to touch. The same is true for men.

Then, use the longest finger of your right hand and move it slowly to the entrance of her vagina. Once you can feel her wetness, push your finger inside (again, move nice and slow). Your hand should be facing upwards, so that your finger can caress the front wall of her vagina, at the famous “G-spot.” Do this while continuing clitoral stimulation with your tongue.

Some girls get aroused by seeing you lose yourself to desire. If she wants to go down on you, let her, but don’t dare force her to. If you’re about to come in her mouth, tell her so, and if she’s ok with it, do it. Some girls get turned on by this. Some girls hate it. Some girls want you to come first because it turns them on. Some girls want to come together with you. Some want to come before you.

If you choose the first option, then your task is to keep your partner’s pleasure heightened. Try changing positions to see which is most pleasurable. Once you find the right technique, keep at it until you’ve reached your desired result. Have confidence in your endurance and let your penis do what it was made for!

“Circles with your tongue are great. I hate flicking. I see it in porn all the time and I don’t get it. Let your tongue be wide and slightly firm, I HATE that thing when a tongue gets all hard and pointy at the tip.”

I wonder if it’s just my personality sometimes because I’m a giver in general, but I think sometimes I may want to try “taking” and focus on that a little. There is someone that “plays” with me and when he touches me I feel like I want more and would want that, but it’s never really been a thing of mine so it’s a little confusing. But then I do really love giving, it’s a lot of fun for me, and I get off on giving pleasure, so I don’t know. It’s been a very long time for me, so I don’t actually know anymore 🙂

I have been able to have that “pee” sensation before and have let go and “ejaculated” but it felt about as good as actually releasing pee (meaning it was DEFINITELY not an orgasm or orgasmic feeling. Just a neat little party trick that does nothing for me. I have heard some women don’t feel that great with them but I would really love for this “need to pee” sensation to be more then just feeling like I actually just DID pee and that was all.

Turns out it’s actually a really good signal when a woman gives you the finger — she’s talking about this move. If she wants it hard and fast, give the finger back right back to her by putting your middle finger inside, and thrusting it in and out of her like a penis.

Ricardus was one of the most prolific and respected coaches in the men’s dating advice industry. He’s dated some of the planet’s most beautiful women, ranging from a Miss World contestant, to a model for Coca-Cola, to one of “Brazil’s Next Top Models.” His specialty is daytime street stops. He is most remembered for his “Are you single?” opening line. Ricardus is currently retired from the dating advice industry.

Another vote for the vibrator. It’s not going to desensitize her unless she’s using it 24 hours a day for days on end. Even if she does feel a little desensitized at first, this will go away within a few hours, a day or two at the most. I would rather feel a little dull down there for a day than never have felt an orgasm in my life.

Explore with foreplay. Sometimes you may feel ready for intercourse immediately, while other times you may want your partner to first touch, rub, kiss, or lick your vulva and clitoris, using his hands, mouth, or penis. Oral sex can be highly pleasurable to many women because of its direct focus on the clitoris. Women describe intense orgasms through oral sex.

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Many women experience frustration from their inability to feel sensation or sexual pleasure from vaginal-penile intercourse. It is common for women to feel closeness, and fullness, but not the intensity they believe that they “should” be feeling. With a little bit of learning and exploration, you can find ways to enjoy various types of pleasure, intimacy, and even ecstasy.

This doesn’t seem fair, because apart from the small minority of men who have psychological difficulties with sex and who cannot relax enough to ejaculate into their partner (delayed ejaculation), most males have no problem at all in climaxing during sexual intercourse.

Take it slow – When you finally decide to show her mercy and end the teasing, start off with a few gentle licks around the lips. Take your time and work your way up to the rough stuff (if that’s what she’s into).

For reference, this seems to be a tl;dr of one chapter of “She Comes First”, aka “Cunnilingus for Dummies.” It’s fairly enlightening and, lack of a better word, educational – basic technique, mindset, it goes over the basics and then some. If anything, it’ll give you ideas. Would recommend.

Read up! Books such as She Comes First: The Thinking Man’s Guide to Pleasuring a Woman, by Ian Kerner, The Clitoral Truth: The Secret World at Your Fingertips, by Rebecca Chalker, and Because it Feels Good: A Women’s Guide to Sexual Pleasure and Satisfaction by Debbie Herbenick can provide more information.

“In a long-term relationship, the sight of your dad bod, which she has seen literally thousands of times, is not going to be enough foreplay to make penetration enjoyable. Cunnilingus goes a long way in bridging the gap between a man’s ‘instant on’ and woman’s need to gradually build up to sex.” — Christian*, 26

Generally speaking, touching or pressing the clitoris, directly or indirectly, during intercourse will increase a woman’s potential to orgasm. Otherwise, it’s like trying to get somewhere in an elevator without pressing the button. Here are a few tips to help you and your partner have a more pleasurable, intense sexual experience:

There’s a chance that she may come on to you first and no man in his right mind would wait to respond. But wait, don’t give in! Tease her a little, play a little hard to get. The game of cat and mouse won’t just make things hotter but also give her a feeling of control – something a lot of women just love!

Welcome to The Mix, a support service for young people. There are loads of ways you can get support from us, including our articles, videos, helpline, counselling, forums, apps and more. To find which service suits your needs use the drop down menu below.

Hi, I’m Elizabeth! About 5mins ago, I orgasmed for my first time like 5 times!!The method I used was easy! First I got used to it by spitting on my fingers and putting them down there so it would get wet(you can also use water!) Next, I took my pointer finger and you will feel a little circle ball thing. Put your fingers just above it and rub with your pointer finger back and forth really fast. Suddenly, you will feel an amazing ticklish feeling where your clitoris (the circle ball thingy) is, keep rubbing, trust me, your lower abdomen will feel great! Now, concentrate on the ticklish feeling, and think about the person you would like to have sex with, keep rubbing, imagine you and the other person having sex. Suddenly, you will feel an explosion of awesomeness in your stomach and vagina! Your body will shake the longer and faster you rub. You will know when to stop, just don’t rub for too long after you get the ticklish feeling!

Orgasms are not all about foreplay. A recent study in the Journal of Sexual Medicine found that the consistency of orgasms is more about the length of intercourse than the length of foreplay. And another study in the same journal clocked her average climax seven minutes after penetration. That makes now the ideal time to climb politely aboard and start the final leg of her leg trembler.

This might sound weird, but I love the feeling of my spouse’s beard on my vaginal opening while he’s going to town on my clit. He’ll even press his chin hard against it because he knows it drives me wild. It just feels sooooooo good to me.

Third, “oral sex” is problematic at best. What “sex” consists of is a complicated, difficult topic, and to presume that the activities described in the article constitute sex is to denigrate people who may choose to engage in these activities precisely because they do not see them as sex, perhaps because their religion forbids sex outside of marriage or something like this. If we just run around willy nilly calling things sex without engaging in constructive dialog about what is and isn’t sex, we pigeonhole people into viewing their activities in ways that may not be compatible with what they would prefer to believe if we had a more open, inclusive society.

Sometimes I think I’m alone in this. I just don’t think it’s that fantastic. I like to be bodily manipulated instead. And fingering. I just don’t cum at all from oral. It’s nice but it’s just not that exciting ever.

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According to a recent study funded by Church & Dwight Co. Inc., the maker of Trojan products, women are more likely to orgasm when oral sex, or cunnilingus, is included in foreplay. Seventy percent of women aged 20 to 24 reported receiving oral sex during sex—so guys, if you’re not going down on your girl, you’re not measuring up to the majority of women’s sexual experiences.

And the number one way she suggests increasing your sexual confidence and taking control over your orgasms is by partaking in a naughty bit of adult show-and-tell and masturbating in front of one another. Whether you choose to discuss in advance the fact that you’re about to give your partner the thrill of their life or surprise them by letting them come home and “catch” you rubbing yourself on the Jennifer Convertible sofa, is entirely up to you. And though you may be tempted to let them in and finish the job, Dr. Carlen suggests restraining your passions and enforcing a no touching rule for as long as possible — which will only make things hotter.

“The most valuable thing you can do is find ways to bring more clitoral stimulation into your sex life,” says sex therapist Vanessa Marin, who is actually launching an online training program to teach women how to orgasm (bless her heart). Work on finding adventurous positions and activities that stimulate the clit, and you’ll be opened up to a whole new world of possibilities.

For reference, this seems to be a tl;dr of one chapter of “She Comes First”, aka “Cunnilingus for Dummies.” It’s fairly enlightening and, for lack of a better word, educational – basic technique, mindset, it goes over the basics and then some. If anything, it’ll give you ideas. Would recommend.

It’s usually a good idea to spend some time kissing and touching before giving a woman oral sex. Take your time to explore her upper thighs and the area around her vagina first, to help her get aroused.

If you want to give her the best orgasm of her life, it’s important to take it slow and create tension. If you focus on the build up, you’re way ahead of 95% of guys. Men and women are different when it comes to sexual arousal. For women, it’s more about the mood, kissing and touching.

“There’s a noticeable difference in the quality of sex if the order is rip off clothes and go down. I feel like women get so used to dudes just lying back and expecting head that it becomes routine and a little boring, despite it being inherently new and exciting.” — Martin

Debby Herbenick, one of the survey’s researchers and an associate professor at Indiana University, told Mic that “the vast majority” of young men enjoy cunnilingus quite a lot. “In new, not-yet-published data from a recent college student survey I conducted, 64% said [they enjoyed performing oral sex] ‘very much’ and 24% said ‘somewhat,'” Herbenick said.

Sometimes encourage her to ‘boss’ your sex sessions. You can learn a lot by watching how she stimulates herself, or by really listening to her when she tells you she wants a particular sex position, or a particular caress.

Clitoral orgasms are usually the easiest for women to achieve so whenever I’m edging multiple orgasms, I usually let her have a clitoral orgasm first. Remember, once she has that first orgasm, the next become MUCH easier and take a lot less time to achieve.

With age comes maturity, and with maturity comes the knowledge that sex usually just isn’t as fun when only one partner gets off. One of the primary reasons men say they love giving oral sex is partly selfish: Making women feel good makes them feel good. 

Here’s a little bit of history for you: Sigmund Freud made a pronouncement that the “mature” woman has orgasms only when her vagina, but not her clitoris, is stimulated — this is commonly referred to as the “vaginal orgasm”. The emphasis on stimulation from penetration made the man’s penis central to a woman’s sexual satisfaction. It is important to emphasize that Freud did not base his theory upon a study of woman’s anatomy, but rather upon his assumptions of woman as inferior to men.

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While the article does not explicitly say this, and Hana can correct me if I’m wrong, part of the point of the first paragraph is that the stereotype that oral sex between a man and a women is centered around blow jobs is inaccurate, and that the sexual experience will be better for everyone if the oral pleasure flows both ways. Whether or not that position is true is left up to each couple, but the article seems to be addressing this specific dynamic that occurs between men and women. The line telling men to “get over themselves” and venture down south, if nothing else, states that some guys don’t consider orally pleasuring women a priority in the bedroom. Again, I don’t know if this is true or not, but I don’t think its fair to read this as saying that men are the only ones performing oral sex on women. The article is written to address a specific issue: that not enough guys will or do perform oral sex on women, and that doing the following will drive their girl into orgasm land. simply because it does not discuss all possible contexts for oral sex does not make it socially “unjust” or ignorant. The title is “A Guy’s Guide to Oral Sex” because that’s what the article is about, and thus seems properly worded enough.

The number one secret to having an orgasm? Five little letters: R-E-L-A-X. If you’re stressed about having one or not having one, um, you’re probably not going to have one. Thinking about it or worrying about it isn’t going to help. So just take a deep breath, calm down and enjoy whatever is happening – if you orgasm, awesome! If you don’t, there’s always next time.

It’s go time! Get your fingers completely out of the area, and maybe do some last-minute kissing while you’re at it too. (Never underestimate the power of a good makeout session.) On your way down, avoid pulling the blankets over your head, because, you know, it tends to get really hot down there.

If only. The majority of men have no idea and don’t care. If what they are doing is feeling good enough for you to gasp, breather a little harder or move into it-they just freaking assume you just orgasimed and stop and finish themselves off.

Explore with foreplay. Sometimes you may feel ready for intercourse immediately, while other times you may want your partner to first touch, rub, kiss, or lick your vulva and clitoris, using his hands, mouth, or penis. Oral sex can be highly pleasurable to many women because of its direct focus on the clitoris. Women describe intense orgasms through oral sex.

What happens in a woman’s body during a climax is very like what happens in your (male) body when you ejaculate. In other words, there’s a feeling of increasing excitement, building up to a point where everything ‘blows’ in a great blast of ecstasy.

For some women, orgasm during intercourse is nearly impossible, and it is very easy for sex to become some sort of contest between them and their partners to “make it happen.” Don’t try too hard. Don’t try every time. Don’t concentrate too much on the physical, or strictly on technique.

8. “If I say, ‘Oh yeah, just like that.’ Then keep doing it just like that. Don’t try to be creative and change it up, if you find something that is clearly working for me, stick with it until I tell you otherwise.” —Bri, 25

This might sound weird, but I love the feeling of my spouse’s beard on my vaginal opening while he’s going to town on my clit. He’ll even press his chin hard against it because he knows it drives me wild. It just feels sooooooo good to me.

By contrast, women who said that they had done these things during their last sexual encounter were about 20 per cent more likely to also tell the researchers that they “usually” or “always” orgasmed.

FOR ALL OFFENDED The Thing Is If EVERY Single Individual Started Identifying Themselves As Something Specific How Could We Ever Go Without Offending Someone Who’s Feeling Left Out At This Point I Say Just Use Original Identification (boy,girl) At The End Of The Day You’re Either Or Although They Have A Right To Tell People They Know And Meet How They Want To Be Identified

Secondly, there’s tongue ache. If your tongue starts to get tired, take a quick time out and gently suck her clitoris or kiss around the vaginal area. After a couple of seconds you can go back to licking.

Most women will not achieve orgasm through an ordinary genital sexual intercourse. And men often are tired after their orgasm. Because of this, it may be best to ensure that the woman has an orgasm before the man. She will still be excited afterwards, and will enjoy his orgasm.

The woman can feel genuinely weightless and free-as-air – which is quite a novel sensation. Another bonus is that either partner can touch the clitoris easily. So it’s different and fun – and usually a great time is had by all.

Now head back to her clit and edge her to the brink of orgasm with your favorite oral technique. Then return to g-spot stimulation but this time give it to her through penetration. Place her legs up over your shoulders and thrust back and forth. Because of the angle created by the pillow, you’ll be thrusting directly into her g-spot.

Give your girl this style of multiples and you’ll notice they start happening much quicker. You can actually get to the point where one orgasm starts before the last is completely done. They start blending together and seem like one giant, never ending orgasm.

I was with a guy once who was enthusiastically performing oral on me. I had told him ahead of time that it feels nice bt that I’ve never met a guy that could make me climax that way. Well, this one was different. I don’t remember what he did, but I started feeling that warm, beautiful tension building. I was quickly approaching the point of no return. I murmured “don’t stop, I’m gonna cum” and he was SO pleased that he got totally thrown off and yeah. That’s how I almost came for the first time in my life without my Hitachi (haven’t ever been able to do it with my fingers)

Turns out it’s actually a really good signal when a woman gives you the finger — she’s about this move. If she wants it hard and fast, give the finger back right back to her by putting your middle finger inside, and thrusting it in and out of her like a penis.

Start off softly, using a relaxed tongue to make slow movements and work up to faster movements with a firmer, pointed tongue. You can experiment with making different patterns with your tongue and try different rhythms – taking cues from your partner as to what she enjoys most.

It appears that the general consensus is that it depends on the woman, and it’s probably best to communicate directly with your partner about her wants and needs. This will require building up a level of trust. Being able to relax in your presence will greatly improve your chances of helping her orgasm.

I mean, ruined orgasms are a thing, but generally you’re right. When someone climaxes, just keep doing what you’re doing until you can feel their whole body relax (or they tell you to stop, obviously).

But remember to work gently at first! Just a flick of the tongue, or a chaste kiss in the beginning could intensify your partner’s sensations. And for your own benefit, remember to be present to taste, texture, smells, sensations. By now your partner is likely very aroused, and it is highly possible that you are, too. Once you have your mouth on your partner’s genitalia, just explore. Try different approaches such as varying pressure or speed of sucking or licking. Remain aware of his/her responses and use your intuition to keep the “conversation” ongoing.

“Circles with your tongue are great. I hate flicking. I see it in porn all the time and I don’t get it. Let your tongue be wide and slightly firm, I HATE that thing when a tongue gets all hard and pointy at the tip.”

– The clitoris. The holy grail of the whole bunch, the clitoris is a tiny knob of flesh you find just below from the beginning of the vulvar slit. The clitoris is home to thousands of nerve receptors making it very sensitive to touch. There are lots of ways to stimulate the clitoris which elicit different responses for every girl. [Read: Clitoris stimulation – 10 sexy ways to please the clitoris]

I don’t really have trouble reaching orgasm and can usually do so in about fifteen minutes. If there is one thing I would say is that give yourself a break otherwise you’ll just get desensitised. I find that every other day works for me.

What we really need is some added attention to our clitoris during foreplay. You can use your fingers while kissing and caressing at the same time. Or better still, you can be a gentleman and use your tongue.

Just as important as it is for men, it’s also important for women to reach climax during lovemaking and experience the peak of pleasure. Even if a woman is adequately aroused, the onus is still on her partner to help her get there. And if you’ve got what it takes, then why stop at one. When it comes to the female orgasm, two are three are in fact better than one, and what better way is there to express your love, improve intimacy and boost that male ego! It’s not difficult to achieve it; here are few tips that can help you give her those epic orgasms that every man likes to think he can and every woman wishes her man could:

You don’t mention that the clitoris is mostly internal. You are overemphasizing the little external clitoral nub. I have no difficulty orgasming with penetration, and I don’t ever touch the glans. Also, the 40-45 minutes of arousal time that women “need” is a stereotype. Women bring themselves to orgasm in a matter of just a few minutes by themselves, and no, they don’t give themselves 30-45 minutes of foreplay to do this.

Most women have at least one fantasy and to make that come true could mean the best orgasm she’s ever had. Ask your woman if she has any deep and dark secret desires – like being handcuffed or even taped! It could be the ultimate sexual experience that leaves her gasping for more.

I’ve been with someone before with a similiar issue. Once she figured it out, it still took us a few months of experimenting to make sex work for her. Oral and manual stimulation on my part were occaisonally successful but in general fairly difficult. Her need was for a very specific kind of stimulation that required very direct feedback.

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Sex toys have come a long way since your mother’s dildo (sorry, not a sexy image). Marin suggests trying a couples’ toy like the We-Vibe or, if you prefer going at it alone, the Eva by DAME products, which is an actual hands-free vibrator that stimulates the clitoris with zero effort — yay for that!

“Dive into her like you’ve never tasted something as good in your life. ” golden. absolutely golden. this entire reply needs to be published in some sex bible. you nailed every part of the ideal process.

Pleasing a woman is difficult according to most men! No one really knows what a woman wants or likes, do they? And what makes it complicated is what she wants once, she may not want the second time around. Now, when things are so complex, how does a man know how to please his woman in bed? Well, the secret is that the first organ that needs to be stimulated is her brain.

Cunnilingus before intercourse can significantly improve both partners’ experience because, to put it simply, it’s better when it’s wetter. (Plus, she’ll probably be more inclined to reciprocate, if you’re into that sort of thing.)

Sexuality authorities also encourage couples to let go of the idea that women “should” have orgasms during intercourse. They encourage men to help women to orgasm using their fingers, hand, tongue, or a vibrator or other sex toys.

Chances are, you’re well versed on all things clitoris-related and know both light touching and applying more pressure to this sensitive spot can result in orgasm. But Dr. Carlen reminds us to encourage our partners to explore the entire vagina — including the labia and vulva, which has the second-most nerve endings after the clitoris and the U-spot, the area on and around the urethra.

As you know, foreplay can take many forms, ranging from simple loving look to a gentle touch, from a passionate kiss to a warm embrace, from gentle stroking of the skin to a vigorous massage. Most women would admit that if they are being brought to orgasm, foreplay is essential to promote desire.

However, there are times when your woman will feel that she’s in the perfect position to get there, and that you’re doing things just right. You need to recognize when this happens, or ask her to tell you. You then need to not change what you’re doing and continue doing exactly the same thing for her.

Virginity is a social construct. Also the gspot is a lie. Penetration is painful for most women to some degree. Very delicate tissues. You should be critical of what society has brainwashed women into doing. let yourself be pressured into penetration. You don’t ever have to do it. In my opinion the risk are not worth the perceived pleasure.

It seems as though the plateau of ‘basic arousal’ and the peak of orgasm are not all that far apart for many women. The trigger moment that tips a woman over from excited into orgasmic is not really that far beyond all the other sensations. This might be different from the way men sometimes experience arousal, because it’s not the same model of having a lot of tension building to major release. I realize I’m oversimplifying and making generalizations, but bear with me.

Women can sustain orgasms of length and intensity that men will simply never know (caveat: men can also become multi-orgasmic with a little bit of effort, but women still get the sweeter end of the stick in terms of orgasmic/peak arousal). So if you’re ignoring it, or are simply uninformed, you’re missing out on a massive treasure chest of sexual experience.

While she’s orgasming, keep the stimulation the same for the first four seconds, then reduce dramatically and continuously, but don’t stop unless she pushes your hand away or motions for you to do so, which means you just have to slow down sooner next time.

The difference between people who are good in bed and people who are not isn’t that the people who are good in bed have learned all the techniques or discovered the secret. The people who are good in bed know that everyone is different, so the way you please a person is to listen to that person, talk about that person’s turn-ons and fantasies, and above all else, pay attention to the way that person’s body responds.

You may feel nervous before having oral sex – whether you’re giving it or receiving it. The best thing to do is to carry on communicating with your partner. Ask them to tell you what feels nice and let them know when you are enjoying something.

And perhaps the most obvious sign of her bodily arousal is production of vaginal lubrication, sometimes in large quantities, so much so that she may feel the wetness growing and seeping outwards into her underwear.

The whole point of the article was not “help on sex tips.” The point of the article was “Ways to Help Her Have Orgasms.” It was in the title right after the number 6 and the key words were HELP and ORGASM.

The unfortunate truth is that some people aren’t comfortable with words like clitoris, so for the purposes of this post I’ll refrain from the use of the word and call it “ringing her bell” after that ’70s song “Ring My Bell,” which I hope was referring to precisely what we’re talking about.

Now you need to get co-ordinated. Each time you kiss her neck, remove another item of her clothes. Not only is this an important time-saver in your 15-minute window, but it lets you combat any body-confidence issues. A study by the University of Cincinnati revealed that if your girl feels good when she’s naked, she’ll come sooner. “Compliment your partner on each part of her body as you undress it,” says psychotherapist Christine Webber. “Your approval will dramatically reduce her selfconsciousness.” And in just 180 seconds, you’ll have an animal on your hands.

Although we will never be perfect in accounting for every possible diversity, there is much we can learn from each other that can change the way we interact and communicate our ideas with less potential for discriminatory interpretation and causing heterosexist repercussions, such as those I previously described in my other comment. Speaking to your initial point, it doesn’t matter whether or not the article was written for a majority of heterosexual students. (Does that mean that discrimination is OK as long as you don’t discriminate on the “in-group”/majority group, compared to the “out-group”/minority group?) The actual article is unremarkable to this discussion insofar as there is still a belief that, as you state, “The title…“A Guy’s Guide to Oral Sex”…seems properly worded enough…because that’s what the article is about” continues to be the current position. That is, in fact, not what the article is geared up to be to many people. Therefore, in the context of this discussion and article, it is important to recognize that not only guys give oral sex to women (lesbian women, etc.), and that not all guys that are giving oral sex are giving such to women (gay men, etc.) A more appropriate title would be “Guide to Giving Women Oral Sex” where it does not assume that the person giving oral sex is neither a man, woman, nor anything in between, and does not assume that what is contained in the article is only informative to “guys”. I know quite a few lesbian women that would love to know #1-5!

If your wife has experienced orgasm, it’s unlikely that she wouldn’t know. Ask her to help you understand how she’s feeling about your sex life together. Encourage her to talk in detail about what feels good and what does not, and try to be a non-judgmental listener. Since most genital nerve endings are concentrated on the clitoris, women need direct or semi-direct clitoral stimulation in order to achieve orgasm. So, during intercourse, it’s wise to provide clitoral stimulation as well.

In fact, contrary to stereotypes that most straight men hate going down on ladies, for many men giving oral sex is just as good as getting it. According to data from the National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior, a majority of millennial men reported having performed oral sex on their female partners in the past year — and it wasn’t just for reciprocity’s sake.

This one is particularly important for a few of reasons: (1) it has to do with giving a woman oral sex, (2) the advice comes directly from a female, and (3) that expert is an award-winner in her field named Dr. Jess O’Reilly, who dispensed this advice in a recent Reddit AMA.

http://www.GSpot101.com – In this video you’ll learn how to give a woman a squirting orgasm, which is one of the most intense orgasms a woman will ever have. Master this squirting orgasm technique and you’ll never have to worry about your woman ever leaving you for another man.

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Do not fondle the genital area until she is ready (use lubricating gel, which you can buy in a drug store). You need to have patience. She may not get an orgasm until after 20 minutes or more. And sometimes it will not work, even if you do everything right. You need to love her anyway.

This is the most common mistake I encounter: Don’t use so much saliva that it ruins all the friction on the clit. You want your tongue to move smoothly, but not slip around like its covered in vaseline. Also, compiling from experience and what me and my friends discuss after too many drinks; its safest to use circles (with your tongue) around the clit,while gently fingering if you’re with a new partner.

“There’s a noticeable difference in the quality of sex if the order is rip off clothes and go down. I feel like women get so used to dudes just lying back and expecting head that it becomes routine and a little boring, despite it being inherently new and exciting.” — Martin

Clitoral orgasms are usually the easiest for women to achieve so whenever I’m edging multiple orgasms, I usually let her have a clitoral orgasm first. Remember, once she has that first orgasm, the next become MUCH easier and take a lot less time to achieve.

Even if you decide to give a man oral sex, it doesn’t mean that you have to let him ejaculate (or cum) in your mouth – the choice is yours. Of course, if he’s wearing a condom this won’t be such an issue, and it means you will both be protected against sexually transmitted infections (STIs). It’s also entirely up to you how long you continue for.

For almost all girls, foreplay is massively important. If you think you can spread her legs, stick it in and have her screaming in fifteen seconds, you’re wrong. That doesn’t depend on the girl. No woman can come like that.

Again, using your sense of touch, soak it all in. Feel it in every possible way you can and notice every sensation beneath your fingertips. Stroke around the whole area: include his/her belly and thighs here, too. Notice what is happening. Is your partner showing signs of pleasure through breath or movement? And importantly, what is it like for you to notice these things? Does it turn you on?

The real value, though, is in the “touchable” videos that let you practice the techniques. They used thousands of images of each woman’s vagina to create incredibly realistic simulations that respond to the speed, pressure, location and rhythm of your fingers on a touchscreen device. As you follow the instructions and perform the techniques correctly, you’re rewarded with (again, pretty hot) audio feedback.

The first time I vaginally orgasmed was last year, which is sad cause I’m 28. The pee feeling came. A secret: Pee BEFORE foreplay so in your mind, you know its not pee even if it feels like you might. In fact, it’s kinda hot, but you will see, it’s not pee. Also, I get pain with deep penetration so for me, the only angle I can come vaginally is if I ride on top, and kind of grind back and forth on my lover. You’ll then feel a gush, or flood. It’s totally different than a clitoral orgasm (which I’ve also learned how to squirt….again, let go of fears) which throws women off.

However other STIs such as herpes, gonorrhoea and syphilis can still be passed on through oral sex. And some infections caused by bacteria or viruses can be passed on through oral–anal sex, such as hepatitis A or E.coli.

You can bring her to the brink of orgasm and then stop touching her “orgasm zone” completely (so if you’re giving her a clitoral orgasm using your fingers, you would completely remove your hand and stop all contact with her clit while you stimulate her breasts or kiss her).

Sometimes I think I’m alone in this. I just don’t think it’s that fantastic. I like to be bodily manipulated instead. And fingering. I just don’t cum at all from oral. It’s nice but it’s just not that exciting ever.

While it’s certainly true there is a point where a woman may need this additional stimulation to reach orgasm, it has to be timed to perfection, otherwise a woman is likely to her climax slipping away from her.

The type of tension that helps women reach is muscle tension (myotonia). Many women have the mistaken impression that they should relax and “just lie there” because they’ve heard that relaxation during sex is important. But it turns out that muscle tension is often necessary for an orgasm. In my experience, the majority of women learn to have their first orgasm by incorporating a fair amount of leg, abdominal, and buttock tension.

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“the best way to make a woman climax |going down on wife”

It may be hidden, but that doesn’t mean you can’t stimulate it if you know what you’re doing. While still tonguing her clitoris, push one finger slowly into her vagina. Leave it until she seems comfortable. Add a second finger, but note that for some women this might be uncomfortable.

Alternatively, you can penetrate her with your fingers. If you’re going the penetration route, there are a couple of options. Insert your fingers all the way in and make a “come hither” motion to try and stimulate her G spot.

There’s only one rule about anal stimulation and it’s “No surprises!” If your woman is up for some experimenting, then use your pinky finger to LIGHTLY penetrate her anus. Make sure your hand is sideways and, just to be safe, keep fingering her vagina at the same time you slip it in.

Also she says that if the environment was right maybe it would be possible for her to achieve a female orgasm which I do agree to a certain extent but truthfully I believe something is wrong with her vagina. She loves me to death and says sex doesn’t really bother her but me it does and the fact that I can’t give her an orgasm makes me feel like I am a total disgrace.

And how does he find out what she wants and what turns her on? Well, a wise man will ask her. What he should not do is to assume that his technique is flawless and that if his partner does not come, it’s her fault.

The first step in learning to get an orgasm is that the woman learns to get an orgasm by masturbation. She can then teach her male partner how to do, and knows when it feels right and wrong. Listen to her, ask her what feels good and not good, try out the best technique together with her. So certainly she is responsible for telling her partner how to make her satisfied.

Today I’m going to give you a series of basic techniques designed to give your beloved woman the very best in erotic, physical pleasure. In my experience, the clitoris is the most consistent source of orgasm for the majority of women. There are other ways to bring a woman to orgasm, of course, but this is where I encourage you to start.

Let’s get this out of the way right off the bat: Health problems can get in the way of an orgasm. So, if something more than your sex life feels off, you should visit a doctor. In absence of a medical problem, however, a woman’s orgasms, or the lack of them, go way beyond what’s going on with her body. That means the main secret to a woman’s orgasms is that they’re as individual as the woman herself. Learning to bring yourself or your female partner to a climax, therefore, can be a learning process, where’s there’s always room for improvement. Here are three common things that can boost a woman’s orgasmic potential – and that couples tend to overlook. 

For almost all girls, foreplay is massively important. If you think you can spread her legs, stick it in and have her screaming in fifteen seconds, you’re wrong. That doesn’t depend on the girl. No woman can come like that.

For men and women alike, the act of giving oral sex can actually create sensations throughout her body that will enhance and increase feelings of sexual pleasure. Some women report that they get more aroused from giving oral sex, than from any other kind of foreplay activity.

#9 Experiment with different finger movements. As mentioned, there are many ways to finger a woman. Finding the right type of stimulation sometimes requires you to try various techniques and movements to find out which one makes her moan louder.

One of the best “you on top” positions to get a woman off is a missionary while putting pressure on the clitoris with the lower pelvis/area right above the base of your penis. Rub hard into it on the in- and out-stroke.

What people get off on sexually can vary as much as love songs on the radio. While some women may prefer to perform oral sex on the ladies they love, there are likely just as many who prefer to receive it. And while one can’t claim to know for sure why people get off on the things they do, here are some reasons a woman might prefer to giving over receiving:

Dang, I was readin the comments, and, realized im not gonna sound near as smart as the rest. All I got to say is, THANX GUYS! I always wondered if I was doin it right. My girl would lie to spare my feelins. Guess she AINT been fakin!! Hooray! I appreciate yall takin the time to write this!!

Now head back to her clit and edge her to the brink of orgasm with your favorite oral technique. Then return to g-spot stimulation but this time give it to her through penetration. Place her legs up over your shoulders and thrust back and forth. Because of the angle created by the pillow, you’ll be thrusting directly into her g-spot.

Ask MetaFilter is a question and answer site that covers nearly any question on earth, where members help each other solve problems. Ask MetaFilter is where thousands of life’s little questions are answered.

Yet again, another question about intercourse and (female) orgasms. I am 25 and have been having intercourse for about 1 1/2 years and have never experienced even the remotest possibility of climaxing from intercourse. Intercourse does NOTHING for me. I’ve read the Hite Report, I know it claims that only 30% of women orgasm from intercourse alone; however, most women who say they don’t orgasm from intercourse say that they at least receive some arousal or stimulation or pleasure from the sensation–it just doesn’t lead them to orgasm. However, I have never received the SLIGHTEST sexual pleasure from intercourse–and it’s making me so unhappy and desperate that I feel I’m going insane.

From another perspective, the adage that the mind is the most important erogenous organ is totally true. Seduce her imagination, and let her little fantasies and scripts just start doing all that work for you. If she feels turned on and safe with you, she’ll probably start telling you how to get her off.

But remember to work gently at first! Just a flick of the tongue, or a chaste kiss in the beginning could intensify your partner’s sensations. And for your own benefit, remember to be present to taste, texture, smells, sensations. By now your partner is likely very aroused, and it is highly possible that you are, too. Once you have your mouth on your partner’s genitalia, just explore. Try different approaches such as varying pressure or speed of sucking or licking. Remain aware of his/her responses and use your intuition to keep the “conversation” ongoing.

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At this point, your vacuum of a tongue might feel a little tired. It’s expected. Combat this by throwing in some side-to-side flicks instead of up-and-down ones, as they tend to be less strenuous on the muscle.

This one is particularly important for a few of reasons: (1) it has to do with giving a woman oral sex, (2) the advice comes directly from a female, and (3) that expert is an award-winner in her field named Dr. Jess O’Reilly, who dispensed this advice in a recent Reddit AMA.

Make sure your fingers are wet, and then, start by going down the side of the clitoris all the way into her vagina and then back out again. This common maneuver of the tongue can also work with fingers, as long as you keep the pressure light and the area very wet.

Some men won’t even give it at all, but even of those who do, it is often a quick formality before sex. This is the wrong way to approach going down on her. Get in there, get comfortable, and enjoy it.

#9 Experiment with different finger movements. As mentioned, there are many ways to finger a woman. Finding the right type of stimulation sometimes requires you to try various techniques and movements to find out which one makes her moan louder.

#3 Know how and where she likes to be touched. Girls who touch themselves would know the perfect formula on reaching an orgasm in the most enjoyable way they can. This is an important clue to understanding how to finger a girl that most people overlook!

In fact, let’s be real. There’s a huge number of us out there who can’t even reach an orgasm from penetration alone, not to mention the fact that there are also a ton of us who have partners who weren’t born with the equipment to have hetero sex. But all that doesn’t matter.

I didn’t orgasm in the presence of a partner (or maybe it was just during intercourse? not sure) until I was 19 years old. For me I needed someone I DIDN’T care about to remove that fear of loss causing me to care what he thought. Admittedly I felt comfortable with this person because he was very inexperienced (later he told me he lost his virginity to me which upset me because I had no idea and it certainly wasn’t “special”!), thus making me feel more confident that I wouldn’t be compared to someone else, or whatever. This one “step” made me feel more sexually confident in subsequent relationships. This person wasn’t just any stranger, I had known him for a few years and we were sort of kind of “dating” (if you want to call it that).

We’ll tell you what gives. While tons of people like to brag that they are gifted when it comes to pleasuring a woman with oral sex, they probably aren’t. And to make matters worse, a lot of us are too embarrassed to call the shots and guide someone when they are down there. Nope, we grin and bear it and most of the time even give the person a pat on the back for their efforts. Awkward.

Unless the clitoris is stimulated during sex, a woman is unlikely to climax during sexual intercourse. That is true whether she is stimulating herself or a man is trying to make her come during partnered sexual activity.

The right setting for an orgasm Description of orgasm problems Incidence of orgasm problems Causes of orgasm problems Treatment of orgasm problems Can a woman have multiple orgasms during intercourse? More articles about sexual disorders

According to sexologists at the Masters & Johnson Institute, cunnilingus is the most reliable route to orgasm for 80% of women. Lou Paget, author of The Big O (Piatkus), recommends the Kivin Method as the fastest way of getting there. “With one hand, pull up her clitoral hood,” he says. “Then lick from side to side across its base, just above her clitoris.” Place one finger of the other hand on her perineum (the area directly below the opening of her vagina). When you can feel her pre-orgasmic contractions, you’ll know you’re in the right place.

The first question you always ask is whether she is able to get an orgasm at all, for example by masturbation. If the answer to this question is no, she must first learn how to get an orgasm. If the answer is yes, you can investigate how to get an orgasm when making love.

You see, most males will ejaculate quite quickly if they have their penises rubbed. This applies even if the circumstances aren’t very romantic – or even if they don’t particularly like the person who’s doing the rubbing.

Woman-on-Top. The woman kneels over the man’s hips. The man makes a fist and places it at the junction of the lovers’ pelvises. The woman leans forward, presses her clitoris against the fist and moves in any way that erotically excites her. Or the woman or man presses a vibrator into her clitoris.

“In a long-term relationship, the sight of your dad bod, which she has seen literally thousands of times, is not going to be enough foreplay to make penetration enjoyable. Cunnilingus goes a long way in bridging the gap between a man’s ‘instant on’ and woman’s need to gradually build up to sex.” — Christian*, 26

This might sound weird, but I love the feeling of my spouse’s beard on my vaginal opening while he’s going to town on my clit. He’ll even press his chin hard against it because he knows it drives me wild. It just feels sooooooo good to me.

I can only remember one time having an orgasm from intercouse alone. When my partner brings me to orgasm by orally stimulating my clitoris, I usually have an orgasm that is very strong, does not last long, and causes such sensitivity that I cannot have him continue orally.

The realities for women vary, says Garcia. “There are some women who never experience orgasm. There are some women who experience orgasm during masturbation but not with a partner. There are some women who experience orgasm during sexual activity but not from penetration. There are some women who only experience orgasm with penetration. There are many women who vary, from one day to another and from one partner to another, depending on other physiological and psychological factors,” Garcia says.

Make sure you know the tricks to arouse her naturally. By using your index finger stimulate her clitoris. The movements should be gentle and in circular motions. Be receptive to feedback and be attuned to both her verbal and non-verbal cues. Her little moans and inviting body language will tell you that you are on the right track. Once you have stimulated the clitoris move to the G-spot. It is believed that this spot, located atop the vaginal cavity, gives a woman the greatest amount of pleasure. Once she is aroused, getting into the act would be more fun, intimate and satisfying for both of you. Also read about the six fun facts that you need to know about the vagina.                                  

In contrast, the vaginal walls contain relatively few nerve endings. Only the lower third of the vagina has enough nerve endings to feel stimulation from a penis, finger, sex toy, or other penetrative object. This can make intense sexual stimulation, pleasure, and orgasm from vaginal-only penetration unlikely. In reality, the clitoris is perfectly placed. You might consider the clitoris to be “inaccessible” because in-and-out intercourse does not touch your button of joy. The challenge is for you and your partner to find and cultivate its potential.

Not only is the tongue the strongest muscle in the human body, but guys, you also have a lot more control over your tongue than you do over your penis, allowing you to apply direct pressure to specific parts of the vagina. It’s crucial to vary the pressure of your tongue once you finally move toward your target. Use a broad, flat tongue to fully cover the vagina—this will apply gentle titillating pressure and will help lube up the area with saliva. For more intense pressure of specific arousal spots, like the clitoris, use a firm pointed tongue to circle and flick.

Okay, now you can masturbate. Exploring your own sexuality is one of the best ways to figure out how to orgasm. Masturbating is great for so many reasons – it’s healthy, it will make you feel good and it will teach you more about yourself, just to name a few. Don’t forget to relax and enjoy yourself – it may take a while before you get into the right groove.

Aside from using your hands and tongue, there are some tricks you can use to make oral sex even more exciting. For example, using mentholated mints or mouthwash before performing oral sex can heighten the pleasure. When your breath is fresh and tingly from a strong mint, your partner will feel the tingling sensation along her vaginal lips and clitoris. You could also try using warming or cooling lubricants or scented massage oils to arouse your girl and amp up the excitement.

Every woman wants to feel and look sexy for her man and she’ll go to great lengths to please him. But how about making her look great for a change? Ditch the stuffed bear and buy her some sultry lingerie instead and ask her strut her stuff in front of you. Not only is it a definite turn on for you, but for her too. Time to make your move!

1) Please communicate. The advice I had doesn’t work on all girls, and there’s nothing but lovely fuzzy sexy orgasms to be had if you just check with your lady-friend about what they like. Do they like very gentle touching? Do they like more insistent touching? Do they like being teased for ages? Do they want your tongue on their Just ask and incorporate (Please don’t have an actual conversation while eating her out, do it before sexytimes. If you don’t want to ruin the sexiness of it all, make it clear to her that she should tell you if she wants you to change anything you’re doing, and start on the gentler side.)

The clitoris is, unfortunately, the victim of censorship. Mainstream media often has a hard time embracing the word and wants to censor or remove it from their dialogue, which suppresses the discussion about the specific realities of female sexual pleasure. This angers me.

If you don’t have the staying power to keep going with penetrative sex, one answer lies in becoming amazing at oral sex. And you can also spend lots more time on foreplay and focus on finding the best position and movement for your partner so that you can bring that time down.

For a woman, it’s often more important to connect emotionally before establishing a physical connect. Start off with something that you know will touch her heart. Plan a romantic evening – dinner, soft lights, music and wine – the works. Start with the wine to get her relaxed. Pull her close and let the wine and the music do the trick! Before you know it, it’ll be she who unleashes her moves on you!

#5 Turn her on and make her wet. Turning her on with foreplay before fingering is a useful trick to make the experience more enjoyable for both. If she’s really turned on, she lubricates freely and she responds better to stimulation.

Just remember, the slower you build, the more intense her orgasms will be. And just like it is for men, the more the person giving oral is truly into it, the hotter it is and the faster the recipient will likely hit climax. So if you’re going to go down, simultaneously act like you’ve got all the time in the world, and unleash yourself and go all the way.

Give your girl this style of multiples and you’ll notice they start happening much quicker. You can actually get to the point where one orgasm starts before the last is completely done. They start blending together and seem like one giant, never ending orgasm.

a vibrator is not the solution cause then your woman experience an clitoral orgasm and not an orgasm through intercourse. order the dvd program penetration orgasm mastery and learn the secrets of penetration orgasm without vibrators but through intercourse. 100% money back guaranteed if you are not satisfied.

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Take it slow, kiss it, respect it, worship it, would you like a girl to give head by just flicking her tongue fast on your dick? would you like head just REALLY fast and hard and nothing else? Nope – giving head is an art, there’s passion in the desire to please. You just need that passion inside you, that desire to please them, once you learn it gets easier.

If you’re happy and comfortable with the person you’re with then oral sex can be a great way to get physically closer and learn what turns each other on. But remember that you can pause or stop at any point you want, and the same is true for your partner. Just because you have started something doesn’t mean you need to continue – stopping is actually very normal.

Unless a woman’s clitoris is close to her vaginal opening, doggy style will just be a fun position for you… while it will feel good for her, without a doubt, it will most likely not provide enough stimulation to make a woman orgasm… at least not anytime soon.

Lines like “it doesn’t mean we’ve had real sex – you’ll still be a virgin”, or “if you don’t want sex then you should at least go down on me”, or “it’s not as risky as having intercourse”, all suggest pressure and coercion. Remember that oral sex should be fun for both of you. If one person is doing it because they feel pressured, it can sour the whole experience.

Building arousal and experiencing multiple Os in one go is definitely about physical technique (don’t worry, we’ll get there), but first step is setting your thoughts and emotions straight. “Becoming a multiorgasmic woman is a mindset more than anything,” Rose says. (And avoid these 5 Common Libido-Crushers.)

Talking to your partner about protection before you start having oral sex will help things go more smoothly. This can be embarrassing, but it’s an important part of having sex – and if you find it too difficult to discuss then it could be a sign that you aren’t ready to start having oral sex just yet.

Do not fondle the genital area until she is ready (use lubricating gel, which you can buy in a drug store). You need to have patience. She may not get an orgasm until after 20 minutes or more. And sometimes it will not work, even if you do everything right. You need to love her anyway.

As for vibrators, I think it’s an old wives tale that they somehow “desensitize” a woman for pleasure by ordinary intercourse. Some women I’ve been with never came during intercourse, but could with a vibrator, and if it weren’t for vibrators, they might never have come at all. I’m not threatened by that, and I don’t feel I “failed” to please. Other women I’ve been with had the ritualistic approach issues y6y6y6 mentions above, but could come anytime the exact right sequence of actions happened. Yet other women of my could come pretty much anywhere, anytime, anyway they wanted, and did.

Touch her as close as possible to the way she touches herself. Her body is likely used orgasming in a particular way and you need to mimic that. Once it happens you can vary the fun more but you need to get over the, pardon me, hump.

While this guide was written primarily for an audience of heterosexual males, I don’t know if that is automatic grounds for deeming it discriminatory and ignorant. One of the points of the article is that guys, being guys, do not have an intuitive knowledge of the female body, and that following the advice given might help guys be able to make foreplay and oral sex more pleasurable for women. Whether or not men need guide on how to eat out women more than women do, I can’t say, but its an important part of the purpose of the article that I don’t think can be ignored.