“oral a _giving good oral to him”

Yet again, another question about intercourse and (female) orgasms. I am 25 and have been having intercourse for about 1 1/2 years and have never experienced even the remotest possibility of climaxing from intercourse. Intercourse does NOTHING for me. I’ve read the Hite Report, I know it claims that only 30% of women orgasm from intercourse alone; however, most women who say they don’t orgasm from intercourse say that they at least receive some arousal or stimulation or pleasure from the sensation–it just doesn’t lead them to orgasm. However, I have never received the SLIGHTEST sexual pleasure from intercourse–and it’s making me so unhappy and desperate that I feel I’m going insane.

(3) Slow down. Extended sensual warm-up time helps women have orgasms. Compared with men, most women need considerably more time to warm up to genital play. Forget the wham bam you see in porn. When making love, do everything at half speed. Sex therapists recommend at least 30 minutes of kissing, cuddling, and whole-body sensual caressing before reaching between her legs.

Touch her as close as possible to the way she touches herself. Her body is likely used orgasming in a particular way and you need to mimic that. Once it happens you can vary the fun more but you need to get over the, pardon me, hump.

#2 Have some lube at the ready. Lube is very important for a variety of reasons. First, not all girls naturally lubricate generously even in their heightened state of arousal. And for beginners, it is safe to have a bottle of lube to ease her with the finger action if  you forgot to properly turn her on.

This might sound weird, but I love the feeling of my spouse’s beard on my vaginal opening while he’s going to town on my clit. He’ll even press his chin hard against it because he knows it drives me wild. It just feels sooooooo good to me.

(4) Use a lubricant. Wetter is better. In just seconds, lubricant makes women’s (and men’s) genitals more erotically sensitive, so it helps women have orgasms. In addition, for women experiencing post-menopausal vaginal dryness, sex may feel uncomfortable without a lubricant.

When we orgasm, it is a response of the nervous system to sexual stimulation. Both men and women can experience orgasm under certain conditions, typically following genital stimulation, but there is a lot of variation in people’s orgasm experiences, says Justin Garcia, Scientific Advisor for Match.com. 

Take it slow – When you finally decide to show her mercy and end the teasing, start off with a few gentle licks around the lips. Take your time and work your way up to the rough stuff (if that’s what she’s into).

There are many techniques, but one good way to start is by circling her bell with two or three fingers held together. The most sensitive part of her bell is at the bottom: her clitoral glans. On some women it’s completely covered by the “hood;” on other women it’s more exposed. 

#5 Turn her on and make her wet. Turning her on with foreplay before fingering is a useful trick to make the experience more enjoyable for both. If she’s really turned on, she lubricates freely and she responds better to stimulation.

As mentioned above, with additional stimulation a woman will move from the plateau phase into orgasm.  It’s often the transition from the plateau phase to the orgasm which presents most difficulties for a woman when she is trying to have an orgasm.

If you want to give her the best orgasm of her life, it’s important to take it slow and create tension. If you focus on the build up, you’re way ahead of 95% of guys. Men and women are different when it comes to sexual arousal. For women, it’s more about the mood, kissing and touching.

As you’re telling her your plans, nibble her ears and pull her hair backwards to expose her neck. Caress, kiss and bite it and put a hand down her knickers to make fleeting contact. Don’t leave your hand down there long. Grope her thighs and don’t be afraid to be strong and assertive – if she knows you’re in charge she won’t know what to expect. Pay her breasts some attention. Leave her bra on to begin with and unveil one nipple at a time, always leaving her wanting more. You’ll know when you’re achieving this, because she’ll try and put your head and your hands where she wants them.

But remember to work gently at first! Just a flick of the tongue, or a chaste kiss in the beginning could intensify your partner’s sensations. And for your own benefit, remember to be present to taste, texture, smells, sensations. By now your partner is likely very aroused, and it is highly possible that you are, too. Once you have your mouth on your partner’s genitalia, just explore. Try different approaches such as varying pressure or speed of sucking or licking. Remain aware of his/her responses and use your intuition to keep the “conversation” ongoing.

While she’s orgasming, keep the stimulation the same for the first four seconds, then reduce dramatically and continuously, but don’t stop unless she pushes your hand away or motions for you to do so, which means you just have to slow down sooner next time.

Of course, I’m not suggesting you follow the same pattern of events every time. That was just an example. The idea is that you don’t fall into an oral routine where she’ll know what you’re going to do before you even start. Vary your movements, hold back, tease the hotspots and then let her have it. Too many people assume that the intimacy, the very notion of oral sex is enough to get a woman off with one flick of the tongue. But we’re not 17 anymore. You’ll have to be more imaginative. Trust me – it will pay off.

1) Please communicate. The advice I had doesn’t work on all girls, and there’s nothing but lovely fuzzy sexy orgasms to be had if you just check with your lady-friend about what they like. Do they like very gentle touching? Do they like more insistent touching? Do they like being teased for ages? Do they want your tongue on their clit? Just ask and incorporate (Please don’t have an actual conversation while eating her out, do it before sexytimes. If you don’t want to ruin the sexiness of it all, make it clear to her that she should tell you if she wants you to change anything you’re doing, and start on the gentler side.)

hell i liked that point sex is all about a women-loved massage , but hell no kissing & massaging for about 30 min , some couples just do it in a whole 30 min can’t believe ,…but i of course like it, as it truly seems getting hurt painfully by sex , not that much pleasure, that’s why some men think women drive them begging at the end , no it’s just all what they want

Naturally, use fingertips and lips. If whole, moist smooches around the neck may get the juices in the vagina going – what do you think kissing her down there can make? Let’s go further. At the time you experience she’s completely ready, I would recommend to accelerate the pace and also to increase the tension. At this point feel free to be a little harder. Then simply consider using your hands just by slipping a pair of fingers in the woman’s vagina. Accomplish this little by little until your mouth accelerate. The fist should be faced palm-up and 2 fingers slightly curved (we’re aiming for the G spot right here, let’s wait and watch if it’s going to give good results). Slip the fingers in for an inch and after that get them out… repeat that a few times. Then move them a few inches… and so a few times. Once you sense it’s getting broader, then feel free to get further as well as rougher.

Now, many women say their best orgasms happen courtesy of the man’s tongue or hand or a vibrator. But for women desiring orgasms during intercourse, these simple variations just allow a woman to enjoy a new erotic pleasure. Happy experimentation. Please comment on your results.

“how to oral him +how to give a good blow”

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But what position? “Avoid deep, thrusting, and instead try the Coital Alignment Technique,” says Taylor. To do it, start in the classic missionary then pull back so the base of your penis rests on her clitoris. Brace your feet against the foot of the bed and rock backwards and forwards rather than thrusting. Your penis gently massages her clitoris, which is great for her but also gives you slow, pulsating sensations that you control.

Your girlfriend probably does not want to go to a gynecologist, because she feels that this is not the problem. One treatment for a dry vagina is lubricating gel. Do not tell her that she is lazy; instead try to understand her wishes and needs. Respect her, if she does not want to go to a gynecologist. To criticize her will kill all desire and she may resent this for a long time.

Again, using your sense of touch, soak it all in. Feel it in every possible way you can and notice every sensation beneath your fingertips. Stroke around the whole area: include his/her belly and thighs here, too. Notice what is happening. Is your partner showing signs of pleasure through breath or movement? And importantly, is it like for you to notice these things? Does it turn you on?

Great tips, and as a woman I totally agree with what’s said here. I hate it when a guy goes too quick from the get-go and will just find a way to stop him. Take your time guys and don’t use the tip of your tongue as much as the flat, soft top of the tongue. Em

One other thing – I’ve been with a couple girls who needed things to be more than a bit on the rough side. I’m not suggesting your girlfriend is in that category, but rather, try to keep in mind that orgasms can be brought on by stuff other than tender coaxing.

Your fingerprints should be facing up, and your fingers should be in as far as the second knuckle. Bend your fingers up until they touch the roof of her vagina. You should feel a soft, spongy area there – this is the G-spot. Start slowly, giving a repetitive “come here” motion with your fingers where you continually caress this area. Keep doing this while your tongue keeps its rhythm on her clitoris and you’ll drive her wild. And this should get her to climax.

Appreciate her body for what it can and can’t do right now, and validate every bit of pleasure she feels. You have to make her comfortable. And, without getting into too much detail about “tricks” you should ensure the following:

– Start touching everything except the clit and vagina. Don’t go for the sweet spots immediately. Build anticipation and make her beg by teasing her external genitalia and deliberately missing the sweet spots.

#10 Learn to sustain fingering at the right moment. A common mistake for most is to stop right at the moment when she’s building up for an orgasm. This is frustrating for her and probably asks for a longer fingering session than normal.

Just moving your hips could mean a lot of things. I don’t blame him for not getting that. If you want him in a particular spot either say so, Grab his hair and and direct his “workings” or flat out tell him.

A great lover is a very good thing to be. Your partner will be more giving, and you’ll have more confidence meeting a new woman knowing that you can make her come. Giving great oral sex is the key to being a great lover, so get out there and try out these 8 tips and techniques. She’ll be glad you did, and so will you!

Sometimes I think I’m alone in this. I just don’t think it’s that fantastic. I like to be bodily manipulated instead. And fingering. I just don’t cum at all from oral. It’s nice but it’s just not that exciting ever.

For the former, it’s all about the deep spot, which is sometimes called the A-Spot. Basically you take you middle finger and go all the way back to her cervix. Using just the tip of your middle finger, you press the top of the cervix until she explodes. It works because the cervix contracts during the female orgasm, and so stimulating that contraction causes a very deep full body orgasm that she almost definitely hasn’t experienced before. This is also great for women who can come from the clit but not from penetration. Look up David Shade to learn more about this technique.  If that doesn’t work, hypnosis is the next step.

– The vaginal canal. This tube of muscle is designed to accommodate a penis and allow the passage of a fetus during birth making it very sensitive to insertion pressure. Human fingers on the other hand, have lesser volume compared to a penis but being moveable makes for various stimulation possibilities.

When your finger is inside of her, try rubbing the top of her inside, moving your finger like you say “come here”. This may be where her G-spot is, if there really is such a thing. Try it. Listen and watch. Keep your mouth on her clit and try different pressure levels, different speeds, see what it does to her.

“Swallow – You know what I’m talking about! If you’re doing it right, it will be inevitable that she will urinate in your mouth. Don’t be afraid. Encourage her. And when she does, give her the same courtesy you’d expect and swallow every drop.”

OK, you can probably file this little tidbit of information under “no duh,” but apparently there really is such thing as an oral sex gap. Yup, women are twice as likely to go down on their partners and half as likely to receive pleasure when the favor is returned. Kind of messed up, right?

“Part of this difference in perception could be due to women faking orgasms, which research has suggested women will do for a variety of reasons, including out of love for their partner, to protect their partner’s self-esteem, intoxication, or to bring the sexual encounter to an end,” the authors note.

Ohhh, so that’s why women are always checking out men’s fingernails? They’re all thinking about a fingering. Yes. Yes, they are. Seriously, uncut, uncleaned, and unbuffed fingernails are painful, so keep your hands to yourself until your nails are smooth enough to run across your own dick hole.

We just like you doing something for us that feels good. The fact you want to do it is awesome. Some women don’t expect an orgasm but you’re going to have to assume we want you to try your hardest for as long as you can. 3 licks and 1 minute is pretty lame. I have kicked guys out of bed for that “are you ready?” after 30 seconds of pussy play. What a stupid question!

As you’re telling her your plans, nibble her ears and pull her hair backwards to expose her neck. Caress, kiss and bite it and put a hand down her knickers to make fleeting contact. Don’t leave your hand down there long. Grope her thighs and don’t be afraid to be strong and assertive – if she knows you’re in charge she won’t know what to expect. Pay her breasts some attention. Leave her bra on to begin with and unveil one nipple at a time, always leaving her wanting more. You’ll know when you’re achieving this, because she’ll try and put your head and your hands where she wants them.

The number one secret to having an orgasm? Five little letters: R-E-L-A-X. If you’re stressed about having one or not having one, um, you’re probably not going to have one. Thinking about it or worrying about it isn’t going to help. So just take a deep breath, calm down and enjoy whatever is happening – if you orgasm, awesome! If you don’t, there’s always next time.

Kait Scalisi, a sexual and reproductive health educator, writer and consultant, is also a huge fan of toys like the We-Vibe Touch, as well as G-Spot toy Je Joue Uma and arousal oils like ON Arousal Oil, which she says brings blood flow to the vaginal area and makes it easier to become aroused and achieve orgasm.

To discover the secrets to orgasm, you need to understand what’s going on under the hood (pun absolutely intended!). The most common way for a woman to reach orgasm is throughclitoral stimulation, although some women also orgasm from stimulation of their G-spot, nipples, or even less obvious erogenous zones like earlobes or neck. 

5. “Make me comfortable. I get super self conscious about my vag (at least I admit it), and if I’m wondering how you’re judging my lady bits the entire time, I sure as hell won’t be getting off.” —Jenn, 24

The clitoris is all about rhythm, but at the start, giving a steady rhythm like this, then breaking it is a great tease. You will feel her body push towards you trying to get the touch it was just becoming accustomed to. Repeat this for about a minute – six full licks followed by one lick that pulls away at the last second.

As we previously reported, the Girls creator underwent a total hysterectomy in an effort to end her longtime battle with endometriosis. While the decision to have her cervix and uterus removed was one she had to make for medical reasons, she’s still struggling with “a broken heart.”

Pro tip: Keep her knees wide apart, and DON’T. RUSH. Essentially, what you’re doing is teasing her before you really get situated, so you’ll want to make sure this part lasts several minutes until she’s more or less begging for it.

Back in the late ‘80s, the CAT made headlines, but it proved to be just a blip on America’s sexual radar. By the 1990’s, it was largely forgotten. But quietly, research has continued, and most results affirm the CAT’s benefit.

In order to relax or get in the mood, you might need to change up some of your surroundings. If nice lingerie gets you in the mood, put some on. If you want a more romantic atmosphere, light some candles and put on some soft music. Want some serious alone time? Go in the bath. Until you can learn to tune out the distractions around you, make your environment super relaxing.

Do not have oral sex if either of you has sores in or around your mouth, vagina, penis or anus, or if the person giving oral sex has bleeding gums. These could be a sign of infection and put you at higher risk of passing on STIs including HIV.

Find some objects in the house that you can use to give different sensations, a kitchen fork or a spoon that’s been in the freezer, a chain or necklace, even get creative with things like a bottle cap etc.

“how to make a female come -female orgaism”

Unless a woman’s clitoris is close to her vaginal opening, doggy style will just be a fun position for you… while it will feel good for her, without a doubt, it will most likely not provide enough stimulation to make a woman orgasm… at least not anytime soon.

We already know that variety is the spice of life, and this couldn’t ring truer than when it comes to oral sex. In other words, always keep her guessing, and she’s likely to do you the same favor in return. “Different strokes may work better on different days. If you find something she likes, come back to it repeatedly, with pauses in between,” Janet Lieberman, CTO at Dame Products, says, “Much like the trick making a pool feel warmer by getting out and getting back in, taking a quick break and coming back to it provides a boost in intensity. It also helps you avoid overstimulating a specific cluster of nerves.”

Virginity is a social construct… um… ya, I guess lol. It’s also a thing. If you have sex, you aren’t a virgin anymore. The social construct aspect, is the stigma attached to it. Feminism is 100% bullshit at this point. Stop drinking the cool aid. I hope you’re less ignorant than you were when you posted these ridiculous comments. Just because some feminist says some crap, or writes it a book, doesn’t make it so. Learn about science, not feminist theory.

#1 Prepare ahead of time. Keep your fingers clean and well-trimmed. Despite the punishment vaginas take during sex, it is still a delicate organ that ladies go to great lengths to pamper. The human hand and fingers are always exposed to different types of contaminants and bacteria since we use them in any activity we do.

WOW!!!! What a night my wife and I just had!! Thanks for the advice, ( like paying attention to other zones ) she went wild. We have been together for some time and I’ve never seen her like that. Your advice and my eagerness to please turned her into an animal. All I can think to say is ,” Thank you” . And WOW!!!

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Slowly and gently begin to run your fingers over your partner’s genitalia. If your partner is a man, you might try gliding your fingers over the shaft, treating it like a delicate and treasured item. If your partner is a woman, you may begin by gently stroking her thighs and softly moving to the outer labia.

Sex toys have come a long way since your mother’s dildo (sorry, not a sexy image). Marin suggests trying a couples’ toy like the We-Vibe or, if you prefer going at it alone, the Eva by DAME products, which is an actual hands-free vibrator that stimulates the clitoris with zero effort — yay for that!

Generally speaking, touching or pressing the clitoris, directly or indirectly, during intercourse will increase a woman’s potential to orgasm. Otherwise, it’s like trying to get somewhere in an elevator without pressing the button. Here are a few tips to help you and your partner have a more pleasurable, intense sexual experience:

Women should be having an orgasm (or more) every single time they have sex. If they’re not, the man she’s having sex with needs to learn how to do it. Every woman is capable of having the orgasm, but it’ll never happen if he doesn’t know how to give it to her. Women always climax when they masturbate, the only difference is the person giving the stimulation. Learn how to have sex, start here with 3 tricks you can use to become a sex god: http://ia69.co/sexgod/

Thanks for your comment. She likes the foreplay to an extent. She does not want or has not used toys. The most I can do is with my fingers. Once in a great while and I do mean a great while I can perform oral sex on her. When this happens she does like it and has had orgaims. But getting her to go from just do it and get it over to lets play is hard. I beleive it is becaues of time and privacy. She does not want to plan sex and when the kids are gone for the day or a while she just is not in the mood.

According to statistics from sleep company Zeo, getting seven or more hours of sleep per night increases youthfulness and physical vigor, while a sleepless night reduces attractiveness by 4 percent and elevates a stress hormone called cortisol by 37 percent, leading more frustration, irritability and unhappiness. Sex is a great stress reducer and sleep aid, but the irony is that in order to really enjoy it, you need to be well rested. Setting the stage for sex means setting the stage for sleep, so don’t be ashamed to make sleep a priority for both you and your partner. Better sex will surely follow. (See some other ways to lay proper groundwork in 8 New Year’s Resolutions for the Best Sex Ever.)

“The orgasm gaps between men and heterosexual women were well known prior to this study,” said Frederick. “The gaps between lesbian women and heterosexual women, however, were more speculative or based on small samples of lesbian women. This study highlights much more precisely that there are multiple orgasm gaps.”

Smell is the strongest of the five senses when it comes to sexual functioning for two reasons: First, since anything musky mimics testosterone, it’ll kick her libido into high gear. Baby powder can have a similar effect by activating her “scent print,” which links babies to procreation. Second, because smell, sex and memory centers share close quarters in the brain, the scent of arousal leaves the most lasting impression. The second she gets a whiff of your musky cologne, she’ll be transported back to the last time she smelled it on your body.

Interestingly enough, there was also a gap in the perception of orgasms. 85% of men said that their female partner had orgasmed – a significantly higher number than the percentage of women who confirmed that they actually had.

Try kissing and licking anywhere between her thighs to turn her on. Move on to the clitoris, starting with gentle licking or sucking. Get her to tell you what motion feels the best, what speed and what pressure turn her on the most. Try it with a relaxed, soft tongue, and change to a firmer, pointed tongue. Some women love an up-and-down licking motion, others like it to go from side to side (like a windscreen wiper), and others still like a circular or pressing-down motion.

So for those of you who have never ventured down south in the bedroom, get over yourselves—this is an essential part of pleasing your woman. Keep these few tips in mind, and she won’t be able to get enough of you.

#4 Adopt a comfortable position. As mentioned, girls take some time to reach the “big O.” If you’re going for the scenic route of the fingering session, you might as well be in a comfortable position to be able to sustain the stimulation until she cums.

Men, do not underestimate the amount of razor stubble on your face and how this feels. If a man has not had a shave in over 8 hours, his razor stubble could approximate the grain of 120 grit sandpaper, which is pretty abrasive. Sometimes a little pressure from the chin or upper lip can feel nice, but not if you’re exfoliating the top layer of musocal tissue. If you think back to the ice-cream example, it may help you remember: while eating an ice-cream cone, you wouldn’t stick your chin in it. So if you have razor stubble, make sure it’s only lips and tongue are contacting the area.

Clitoral orgasms are usually the easiest for women to achieve so whenever I’m edging multiple orgasms, I usually let her have a clitoral orgasm first. Remember, once she has that first orgasm, the next become MUCH easier and take a lot less time to achieve.

As we previously reported, the Girls creator underwent a total hysterectomy in an effort to end her longtime battle with endometriosis. While the decision to have her cervix and uterus removed was one she had to make for medical reasons, she’s still struggling with “a broken heart.”

Honestly Breve you are thinking way too hard about the situation at hand. Women that can cum vaginally are rare. It just isnt something that all women can due. Try having her stimulate her clit while you are pumping and she will eventually reach her climax. Another thing that is rare but can be achieved is for your women to have multiple orgasms. you simply repeat the process that i just explained. if you can beat my record i would love to hear about. My record is giving my gf 6 orgasms in one 45 minute- 1 hour session. with her playing with her clit each time of course. good luck!!

And the number one way she suggests increasing your sexual confidence and taking control over your orgasms is by partaking in a naughty bit of adult show-and-tell and masturbating in front of one another. Whether you choose to discuss in advance the fact that you’re about to give your partner the thrill of their life or surprise them by letting them come home and “catch” you rubbing yourself on the Jennifer Convertible sofa, is entirely up to you. And though you may be tempted to let them jump in and finish the job, Dr. Carlen suggests restraining your passions and enforcing a no touching rule for as long as possible — which will only make things hotter.

Hi. My wife doesn’t like oral kissing, nipple kissing and caressing, clitorial stimulation and she said she feels good only during intercourse. She also doesnt like prolonged penetration. Does he have problem???

Just moving your hips could mean a lot of things. I don’t blame him for not getting that. If you want him in a particular spot either say so, Grab his hair and and direct his “workings” or flat out tell him.

If you are already penetrating correctly, or she’s on top, then sucking, pulling, spanking her “sexy parts”, preferably a few of them simultaneously (ask her what she likes; I’m sure she’ll point you in the right direction), combined with some dirty talk, and she’ll be tightening up, gyrating and vibrating into orgasm in no time.

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Wow.. Thanks for your piece of advice here….. I’ve not tried any though but i’m going to and hopefully it works…. My problem is that with a condom i can last up to 1 hour but without i can’t boast of 5mins… I wonder if you can help me?

The reason? During intercourse (missionary, doggie, woman-on-top, whatever), the penis does not directly stimulate the clitoris, the organ responsible for women’s orgasms. Sexuality experts reassure couples that the woman’s inability to experience orgasm during intercourse is (1) very common, (2) no reflection on her sexual responsiveness, (3) no reflection on the man’s sexual technique, and (4) no reflection the woman’s feelings about the relationship. I agree.

Changing our breath changes the way we experience things, in all areas of life. Especially when it comes to sex (the tradition of Tantra has long-existed for a reason!). Before you begin going down on your partner, gently blow on and around his penis or her vagina, and the surrounding pubic area. Start further away and slowly get closer and closer. Again, be present and mindful, not only to what is happening for your partner, but what is happening within yourself as well.

Some feminists reject the idea that men “give” women an orgasm. They claim that equality requires that each is responsible for their own orgasm. Other people see love making as a mutual activity of giving and taking.

There are other key internal erogenous zones (I’ll write a deep dive article on G-spot and cervical orgasms sooner than later), but a decent percentage of women can’t orgasm without some form of clitoral stimulation taking place. Give the little cutie the attention, love, and respect it deserves.

And when I say firm strokes, I mean firm. When you’re more than a few minutes into stimulating her, it’s nearly impossible to go too hard with a few fingers. Think about it: babies come out of there. It can handle a lot of stress. Some of the best orgasms I’ve given women were when I was giving it every ounce of strength I had.

Statistically speaking, without having talked at all with the woman, clitoral stimulation of some kind is likely to be most effective in producing an orgasm. And be aware that there is a significant percentage of women who are anorgasmic.

“Guys generally worry about their dick size or sex skills, and would probably err on the side of caution that they are less than average at both (though they would probably never publicly admit it). If you become good at [giving head], you generally don’t have to worry about lacking in the other departments.” — Curtis

What you should do on your way down, however, is gently kiss her chest, stomach, and inner thighs—throw in some light nibbles, too. Do this until you reach the final point of destination, and then slowly and softly dig in with your tongue. Also, the slower the better – the wait will kill her with anticipation.

Communicate your likes and dislikes, experiment to see what feels best for both of you. And for some ideas of well-known positions that many women find ideal, read the best sex positions for women to have orgasms.

And straight women like me feel somewhat awkward at first when we read things like ‘kiss her from her neck to her naval…’ But after a second, I was able to read through the various advice and show my boyfriend what I found to be the best ideas. Maybe it will help more girls get the orgasms they need.

Debby Herbenick, one of the survey’s researchers and an associate professor at Indiana University, told Mic that “the vast majority” of young men enjoy cunnilingus quite a lot. “In new, not-yet-published data from a recent college student survey I conducted, 64% said [they enjoyed performing oral sex] ‘very much’ and 24% said ‘somewhat,'” Herbenick said.

Sometimes you’re in the mood to get some action but don’t actually feel like having anything inside you. Whether you’re on your period, have a UTI or just plain aren’t in the mood for it, the good news is, there are plenty of other ways for you and your partner to get off together without having old-fashioned intercourse.

She’s almost naked now but keep her underwear on for another minute or so. “Stroke and caress her through the fabric rather than going for gold,” says sex therapist Paula Hall. “Focus on building anticipation rather than going straight for direct stimulation.” Feeling that time is short prevents a woman from reaching orgasm, adds Webber. Act like you’ve got forever, but then peel off her underwear and use Durex’s new strawberry-scented Intimate Lube (durex.com). This will get her excited, and make her more sensitive. Research at the US Association for Chemical Reception Sciences found the scent of strawberries alerts the senses. Move your fingers in slow, circular motions just inside her vagina. “Many women need attention focused on the outer third of the vaginal canal, where the G-spot, the clitoris, and the PS-spot (opposite the G-spot) can be reached,” says Emma Taylor of the sex blog emandlo.com. Women love a man who’s good with his hands…

the position you describe is very good. but there is an improvement i can add. you start in the missionary position and then she puts her legs flat on the bed, then move your hips higher on top of hers. then she holds you tight (arms and vagina)and then she pulls her legs together while you put your legs outside of hers. her face should be looking at your chest. it takes a bit of doing at first. but just keep in mind the old joke about, how do you get to carnagie hall? the answer is , you have to practice , practice , practice. trust me , you will love it.

“make woman orgasm _female orgasm techniques”

Pro tip: Keep her knees wide apart, and DON’T. RUSH. Essentially, what you’re doing is teasing her before you really get situated, so you’ll want to make sure this part lasts several minutes until she’s more or less begging for it.

Alexandra Fine, CEO at Dame Products, agrees that slow and steady wins the race, “There are lots of tips and tricks on how to do the deed, but where most men fail in cunnilingus is during the arousal phase. Women can take 20 minutes plus to get physically aroused. That means that, however slowly you think you are getting from her mouth to her clit — go slower! Wait until she arches her back and thrusts her hips up — then you’ll know you’ve hit the spot.”

After you’ve stroked the hood for a bit, you can move to direct contact with the bell, and include it in your circular stroke more or less prominently, depending on what type of touch she seems to like. Speed up your circles a little and stop kissing her. Tell her to feel those good feelings. That helps her focus on the sensation, which will help her reach orgasm.

With age comes maturity, and with maturity comes the knowledge that sex usually just isn’t as fun when only one partner gets off. One of the primary reasons men say they love giving oral sex is partly selfish: Making women feel good makes them feel good. 

While the article does not explicitly say this, and Hana can correct me if I’m wrong, part of the point of the first paragraph is that the stereotype that oral sex between a man and a women is centered around blow jobs is inaccurate, and that the sexual experience will be better for everyone if the oral pleasure flows both ways. Whether or not that position is true is left up to each couple, but the article seems to be addressing this specific dynamic that occurs between men and women. The line telling men to “get over themselves” and venture down south, if nothing else, states that some guys don’t consider orally pleasuring women a priority in the bedroom. Again, I don’t know if this is true or not, but I don’t think its fair to read this as saying that men are the only ones performing oral sex on women. The article is written to address a specific issue: that not enough guys will or do perform oral sex on women, and that doing the following will drive their girl into orgasm land. simply because it does not discuss all possible contexts for oral sex does not make it socially “unjust” or ignorant. The title is “A Guy’s Guide to Oral Sex” because that’s what the article is about, and thus seems properly worded enough.

Fingering a girl into a satisfying climax may seem easy. Once you find yourself in the critical moment, you discover it can be as challenging as defusing a bomb with all red wires. And if you think gunning your fingers in like a jackhammer does the job, you’re very much mistaken. Here’s a guide on how to finger a girl for beginners.

When you have found something that works well, keep on doing it! Take a break if you need one, but avoid stopping suddenly because it can be very frustrating for the woman. Ask if she wants you to use your fingers as well. If she says ‘yes’, make sure they are wet before you start moving them around on her clit or inside her.

More excellent advice. And get some erotica (books or DVD’s) to go with it. She can then experiment at her leisure without any stress. Forget all the worrying about desensitizing and such. Just have some fun. I suspect that there’s nothing wrong with your girlfriend that a little “education” can’t fix.

Personally, it’s a very rare climax where I don’t touch clitoris or have my partner rub it. And by rare, I mean I have to be insanely turned on and not have had sex in a month or so (I go on the road for work).

OMGYES is a website that wants to help anyone who cares to make sex more pleasurable for women. They’ve conducted tons of research and put together interactive how-to simulations to help make you a better lover.

One other thing – I’ve been with a couple girls who needed things to be more than a bit on the rough side. I’m not suggesting your girlfriend is in that category, but rather, try to keep in mind that orgasms can be brought on by stuff other than tender coaxing.

You can begin by gently kissing and fondling the area around the anus including the perineum (the area of skin between the genitals and the anus). You can then work your way in to the anus by circling your tongue around the outer area and finally inserting your tongue.

But even if you are the queen of masturbatory techniques, you might still find it tough to climax during full sex, and this will almost certainly be because your clitoris is not getting sufficient attention.

Sometimes I think I’m alone in this. I just don’t think it’s that fantastic. I like to be bodily manipulated instead. And fingering. I just don’t cum at all from oral. It’s nice but it’s just not that exciting ever.

Many women have trouble having orgasms, particularly women under 35 or so. In addition, many women who are orgasmic solo by hand or vibrator have problems getting there during couple sex. I suggest your friend and her husband check out the Info Library on my site, GreatSexAfter40.com. (It focuses on sex in the second half of life, but has tons of information for lovers of all ages.) The Info Library contains 100 articles, several of which relate to women’s orgasm difficulties and how men can help women have them. Articles can be purchased individually, or people can buy all of them (a much better deal). If the articles don’t provide sufficient relieve, then I’d suggest sex therapy. Your friend can find a therapist at the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors, and Therapists: aasect.org. Please tell your friend that her issue is quite common and that it CAN be resolved.

When you go back to using your tongue, add a finger or two to stroke her G-spot on the first few inches of the upper inside wall of her pussy. Try matching pace and pressure with your fingers and tongue and then contrasting slow, firm strokes with your fingers and rapid flicks of the tongue.

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Don’t just go barging in down there. Take your time, and make sure you are both feeling turned on before you venture south. If you aren’t used to giving head, don’t expect to bring her to a climax in seconds flat. And if you have bad stubble on your chin, forget it; no girl wants razor burns in such a sensitive place.

Therapy can help some women having difficulty with orgasm. For others, a medical condition or side effects from a medication may be causing the problem. Visit your doctor to rule out these causes. Options for treatment include the following:

Next, when performing oral sex, you should try your best to be relaxed. Any hesitation or anxiety may be interpreted negatively by your partner and can be a source of distraction or turn off. If a woman thinks that you are not into it, she is not going to be into it. The best is when you can let yourself go and really eat her out. Attitude and enthusiasm are important.

Great tips, and as a woman I totally agree with what’s said here. I hate it when a guy goes too quick from the get-go and will just find a way to stop him. Take your time guys and don’t use the tip of your tongue as much as the flat, soft top of the tongue. Em

Now, press your fingers against her in series of slow, even and medium-depth pulses. Light pressure is too insignificant. Heavy ones can hurt, but women sometimes prefer this. Keep kissing her while you touch her down there. Combining pleasures is a skill, and an incredible one when done right.

For most men, sex ends with an orgasm. This is very important for most men. And after the orgasm, most men are satisfied and not willing to participate in active sex any more for some time. All this is different for women.

There isn’t one single procedure for it. What everyone else told you is true, it’s individual and requires patience and attention and sensitivity. What makes me fly to the moon isn’t what makes your girlfriend do that. Try things, be gentle, be loving, and she will come.

The first step in learning to get an orgasm is that the woman learns to get an orgasm masturbation. She can then teach her male partner how to do, and knows when it feels right and wrong. Listen to her, ask her what feels good and not good, try out the best technique together with her. So certainly she is responsible for telling her partner how to make her satisfied.

As for vibrators, I think it’s an old wives tale that they somehow “desensitize” a woman for pleasure by ordinary intercourse. Some women I’ve been with never came during intercourse, but could with a vibrator, and if it weren’t for vibrators, they might never have come at all. I’m not threatened by that, and I don’t feel I “failed” to please. Other women I’ve been with had the ritualistic approach issues y6y6y6 mentions above, but could come anytime the exact right sequence of actions happened. Yet other women of my experience could come pretty much anywhere, anytime, anyway they wanted, and did.

Get her juices flow before engaging her bell skin-to-skin. Her body needs time to get physically aroused, and most often that takes longer than it does for men. Cup her groin in one hand on the outside of her clothing and place your four fingers on her warmest area.

We were doing a sex change operation, and the patient got a raging hard on; the doc had the erect penis in her hand and said “I cant work with this hard-on in the way” we gave a med that guarantees to get it down, and continued with our business.

This might sound weird, but I love the feeling of my spouse’s beard on my vaginal opening while he’s going to town on my clit. He’ll even press his chin hard against it because he knows it drives me wild. It just feels sooooooo good to me.

Every guy knows that when a woman hits the sack she loves to wedge her cold feet between his legs to warm up. Warm feet do more to make a woman physically comfortable than just about anything else — even more so if you want her completely naked, which is not likely to happen if she’s cold, even with the lights off. What most of you probably didn’t realize was the importance of warm feet in increasing the likelihood of her experiencing an orgasm. According to Dutch scientists from the University of Groningen, the odds of achieving female orgasm are increased by 30%. Maybe leaving the socks on isn’t such a bad idea after all. If you want to try something sexier, a foot massage with a warming gel can do wonders, especially if you concentrate on the pads of her toes and the webbing in between, which are linked to her nether zones according to reflexology charts. Moreover, lips, hands, feet, and genitals get the lion’s share of brain space, where feet and genital centers are neighbors, making them share sexy information. Why else do you think women call shoe shopping “retail therapy” — especially when they’re not getting any at home and feeling bummed out? So socks or stilettos, you choose, as long as they’re keeping her tootsies warm.

“how can a girl get an orgasim +giving my wife oral”

Yes, you can do exercises for your vagina. Kegels will strengthen your vaginal muscles and can make it easier for you to orgasm. Do them by tightening and then relaxing your vaginal (think about what you do when you really have to pee). You can do these anywhere at any time without anyone noticing.

Giving good oral is a knack. Like any other skill, all you can do to develop it is practice and repetition. It takes some time to be able to tune into a woman and intuitively read her arousal blueprint. But I promise it’s not as hard and mysterious as everyone makes it out to be.

While you’re using your tongue, try switching between accompanying stimulation, such as massaging her thighs, pulling back the clitoral hood, stimulating the G-spot with fingers and pushing up on the backs of her knees to change the angle and position of stimulation.

We love variety and the element of surprise. Men tend to think of sex as penetration, with foreplay consisting of undressing, a bit of kissing, perhaps some obligatory oral sex or massage of the nipples and breasts. But many women wish men paid more attention to quality foreplay.

Statistically speaking, without having talked at all with the woman, clitoral stimulation of some kind is likely to be most effective in producing an orgasm. And be aware that there is a significant percentage of women who are anorgasmic.

The CAT position sounds interesting but I am concerned with the awkwardness of the position. Using a vibrator with woman on top seems like the best option in my opinion. Then again I should try out some of the above options and then decide!

Below is some discussion about how to help a woman get an orgasm. Important to note is that obtaining an orgasm may not be what is most important for her. Maybe other things are more important. Do not feel forced to obtain orgasm for the woman, unless this is her own wish.

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Once you have found the right spot, women need repeated stimulation in the same area in order to reach orgasm. Remember that orgasm alone should not be the only focus of oral sex. Heightened arousal, lubrication, and pleasurable sensations are all important whether or not she reaches orgasm. Because good oral sex means spending a little time downstairs, make sure to find yourself a comfortable position that you can maintain for at least ten minutes. Don’t just lick for one minute then move on. If the position she prefers is too hard on your neck, try lifting her hips up by placing a pillow underneath them, or by having her on her side and resting your head on the inside of her thigh. Also, you do not have to tolerate being suffocated or having your head squeezed by her legs, so use your hands on the inside of her thighs to remind her if needed.

We’ve all heard whispers and rumors, but actually having multiple orgasms? Well, that’s on par with having hair like a Victoria’s Secret angel and a metabolism that can burn right through morning bagels. But sexperts are here to reassure us all that multiple orgasms really do exist and—even better—that we can all have them!

Just remember, the slower you build, the more intense her orgasms will be. And just like it is for men, the more the person giving oral is truly into it, the hotter it is and the faster the recipient will likely hit climax. So if you’re going to go down, simultaneously act like you’ve got all the time in the world, and unleash yourself and go all the way.

A dry beaver is an unhappy one, so make sure she’s wet before you dive in. Once she is, dip your digits between her lips and gently give the area several light, teasing strokes. Then, slowly move your fingers all the way inside her.

Even if you are both very experienced lovers, it can take a long time to bring the woman to orgasm, so don’t stress out, and keep practicing if that’s what you’re aiming for. It’s worth the effort, and she will most likely be happy to return the favour.

The G-spot is located about 2-3 inches deep and upwards, towards the front wall. You should feel a rougher patch of skin. Imagine trying to touch her belly button internally and you’ve got the right idea. Start slowly, softly, and then, build yourself up to a hard thrust.

It’s as easy as believing it’s possible for you personally to climax more than once, Anami says. Next is learning to relax: “Deeper orgasms are all about a very intense state of release, so you have to be willing to dive into the unknown and let go,” Anami adds. Once your attitude starts to shift, two or more orgasms may well become your new normal, Rose says.

What is the connection between tensing muscle groups and having an orgasm? Arousal. Contracting (or tensing) certain muscles increases blood flow throughout the body and often to the genital area. And arousal, of course, is the road map that helps lead most women to orgasm.

Men’s reasons for loving a little tongue action are manifold, but they mostly stem from the same fundamental (and not totally shocking) truth: Women like being eaten out, making that in itself a worthwhile pursuit. For many especially enthusiastic men, though, cunnilingus is about way more. 

“the best way to give a woman an orgasim -femal organism”

However, for women, it’s not always all about the O. Women’s sexuality often seems to be a bit differently constructed than men’s, and sex is best when that’s embraced and enjoyed rather than viewed as a challenge. It’s quite possible for many women to thoroughly enjoy sexual experiences that include lots of touching and kissing (genital and non-genital), talking, playfulness, intercourse, the whole nine yards, and never have an orgasm, and still consider it a very good and even satisfying experience. So it’s quite likely that your girlfriend is enjoying everything you’re doing already. That is, you’re probably not doing anything wrong, nor do you need to master special tricks at this stage.

Allow her to take the lead: If you really want her to get more epic orgasms, then don’t call all the shots. Allow her to take the lead as well and control the rhythm of things. Give her a chance when you have aroused her enough to get into the act. This will really help her be her best in bed and you should find the experience to be a lot more satisfying than you could possibly imagine.

I don’t usually cum from oral if it’s the first thing we do. But if we’ve already fucked I cum in seconds. If we did cunnilingus and then fellatio I’m usually turned on enough to cum from cunnilingus but not supper quickly. It can be speeded up by the addition of a dildo.

The tongue is more than capable of doing all the work itself, but you can take a woman even further by using your fingers. A great technique is to lick her clit and then gently put your middle finger inside her vagina. You can then rest you index finger and ring finger on the outside of her vagina. If she seems comfortable you can use the come hither technique. Using you index and middle finger, put them inside her vagina and then with the fingers inside her pretend you are signalling for someone to come over to you.

After foreplay by kissing and fondling (may have to continue for up to 20 minutes) the partner or the person herself stimulates the clitoris (the area below the labia or genital lips, and above the vagina opening) by rapidly flicking a finger or the tongue back and forward or up and down. Do not press hard. If you are using a finger, be sure to use lots of lubricating gel (can be bought at a drug store). If you are using the tongue, lubricating gel is usually not necessary, since lubrication comes from the mouth. Ask her to concentracte on sexy thoughts at the same time.

OK, you can probably file this little tidbit of information under “no duh,” but apparently there really is such thing as an oral sex gap. Yup, women are twice as likely to go down on their partners and half as likely to receive pleasure when the favor is returned. Kind of messed up, right?

Women can enjoy sex even if they do not get an orgasm. They enjoy the nearness and intimacy, the fondling and the feeling of love and desire. A request from the man that she must have an orgasm can be a problem for the woman. In spite of this, you should try to learn to satisfy her. I know of women who have left their boyfriends when they have met a man who knows the right way.

Orgasms are not all about foreplay. A recent study in the Journal of Sexual Medicine found that the consistency of orgasms is more about the length ofintercourse than the length of foreplay. And another study in the same journal clocked her average climax seven minutes after penetration. That makes now the ideal timeto climb politely aboard and start the final leg of her leg trembler.

The whole point of the article was not “help on sex tips.” The point of the article was “Ways to Help Her Have Orgasms.” It was in the title right after the number and the key words were HELP and ORGASM.

Fingering a girl into a satisfying climax may seem easy. Once you find yourself in the critical moment, you discover it can be as challenging as defusing a bomb with all red wires. And if you think gunning your fingers in like a jackhammer does the job, you’re very much mistaken. Here’s a guide on how to finger a girl for beginners.

No matter if you touch it or lick it, one thing is crucial: your PERSISTENCE.  Repeat the same move between her legs continuously and patiently. Make her feel that you won’t stop until she screams with pleasure. She must feel it that it’s fun for you to take care of her and you will not finish in the middle of doing that. She must feel that she is melting with each stroke of your finger or tongue and slowly falling into the deep hole of pleasure.

Just moving your hips could mean a lot of things. I don’t blame him for not getting that. If you want him in a particular spot either say so, Grab his hair and and direct his “workings” or flat out tell him.

Sex toys have come a long way since your mother’s dildo (sorry, not a sexy image). Marin suggests trying a couples’ toy like the We-Vibe or, if you prefer going at it alone, the Eva by DAME products, which is an actual hands-free vibrator that stimulates the clitoris with zero effort — yay for that!

The complexity of sexual relations is shown by the fact that orgasm is not only enjoyed by the person having orgasm. The orgasm of the man is important to the woman, and reversely the orgasm of the woman is felt as important for many men, maybe too important.

Men, do not underestimate the amount of razor stubble on your face and how this feels. If a man has not had a shave in over 8 hours, his razor stubble could approximate the grain of 120 grit sandpaper, which is pretty abrasive. Sometimes a little pressure from the chin or upper lip can feel nice, but not if you’re exfoliating the top layer of musocal tissue. If you think back to the ice-cream example, it may help you remember: while eating an ice-cream cone, you wouldn’t stick your chin in it. So if you have razor stubble, make sure it’s only lips and tongue are contacting the area.

Once you are doing that trick with your tongue. DO NOT STOP. In some cases, you will have to use you fingers to spread her “lips” to find her clit. And some girls like it if you finger them at the same time when you play with them with your tongue but I suggest you only do that once you feel them getting wet (around the hole of their vagina.)

It was once assumed that women didn’t have orgasms, or at least that they were very different from what men experienced. Thankfully, nowadays we know that women have all the equipment required to produce sexual pleasure – and that there’s nothing wrong with enjoying it. Still, most statistics estimate that about 30 percent of women have trouble achieving orgasm. 

First you’ve got to turn up the sexual tension by relying on the “anticipation of orgasm” technique (as explained in the article on foreplay). Once her underwear is off, the action can start moving faster: it’s time to show her that you know how to take care of her needs!

It seems as though the plateau of ‘basic arousal’ and the peak of orgasm are not all that far apart for many women. The trigger moment that tips a woman over from excited into orgasmic is not really that far beyond all the other sensations. This might be different from the way men sometimes experience arousal, because it’s not the same model of having a lot of tension building to major release. I realize I’m oversimplifying and making generalizations, but bear with me.

Forget fingering (for now) and use your entire hand to take her pleasure to new heights. Place a flat hand against her vulva (as though you’re cupping it) and apply pressure as you slide up and down. You’ll need lots of lube for this one!

Some women “opt out” when the physical sensations get too intense. In that case, and if your girlfriend is willing, some light bondage can be very effective. It can free the woman from decision-making about when to stop, what they “should” be doing, etc. It’s a great way to break a plateau. And many women who have never had an orgasm simply don’t know what they are missing. Its great that you care enough to work so hard at pleasuring her.

I am 28 years old. I’ve had a problem for years now; well, I had this problem all my life and I was too ashamed to seek help. Here it goes: during sexual intercourse, I never feel any sensation or tingling feelings, I feel nothing. I can feel the penis, but that is all. This has been with every guy I’ve been with and I’ve been with about 15 guys. I’m currently dating this guy for five years. I love him, but during sex, I feel nothing. He turns me on, and I get aroused, but when it comes to actually having sex, I feel NOTHING. It’s like I have a disjunction in my vagina. Does it have something to do with my clitoris? What is wrong with me? Please, can you tell me? I will eventually see a doctor, but I just want to know, what is the problem with me? Please, I would really appreciate it, I’ve kinda learned to live with it. Sad, right? 🙂

Statistically speaking, without having talked at all with the woman, clitoral stimulation of some kind is likely to be most effective in producing an orgasm. And be aware that there is a significant percentage of women who are anorgasmic.

The amount of content available in what they call the first “season” is almost overwhelming, and that’s kind of the point. Yes, all women are different, but as you see and practice real-world techniques and understand how they relate to the larger concepts, you’ll eventually be equipped with a toolbox of sorts for the bedroom. The female orgasm has been a taboo subject for far too long, to the dismay of both women and men. These people are doing phenomenal work with regards to making sex a better experience for everyone.

The clitoris is the most powerful spot on a woman’s body, so get ready to use two fingers (the index and middle finger) to rub her clitoris in a soft and circular manner. By now she should be sufficiently aroused with foreplay, so her clitoris will be swelling and slightly enlarged.

Start by kissing your partner down there – on her inner thighs and lower belly, gradually approaching the clitoris. Start gently licking. Do not apply too much pressure! It’s full of sensitive nerve endings, so be gentle!

It’s down to the hormones we produce – after she’s had an orgasm during sex a woman is much more likely to want a period of cuddling and interaction; after his orgasm, a man is likely to want to sleep.

I was with someone in this situation right around the time I turned 20. It took about a year of awesome sex for her to finally begin experiencing orgasms, and even then they were rare. It seemed to be very dependent on physical positioning, angle, direction of motion, etc. I suggest you just pursue the positions, etc that seem to work the best and keep trying at them.

Before we get hot and heavy, remember — a little lesson in anatomy can lead to huge results. A woman’s sexual pleasure, and ultimately orgasm, is much more likely to occur from stimulation to the clitoris. The clitoris is highly sensitive and full of nerve endings. In fact, there are as many nerve endings in the tip of the clitoris as there are in a man’s penis! Many of the clitoral nerve endings are subterranean, or below the surface; the visible part of the clitoris is just the tip of the iceberg. However, even “in hiding,” those 6,000 to 8,000 sensory nerve endings can be a mega source of incredible pleasure for many women. 

How refreshing to read an honest, accurate discussion about orgasms for women! Thanks for making it clear from the get-go that most women cannot have orgasms from intercourse alone and need other stimulation.

Michael Castleman’s articles are always well researched at the same time interesting.I found a few things that i dont know myself as a girl.I am humbled by the rich information found in this page not only in the original post but even in the comments left by few others.

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Interestingly enough, there was also a gap in the perception of orgasms. 85% of men said that their female partner had orgasmed – a significantly higher number than the percentage of women who confirmed that they actually had.

“how to do oral to a girl |best female orgasam”

For her, this really does everything to do with being comfortable, relaxed, and free of anxiety. Every woman has to learn to have orgasms at some point…some of us figured it out independently at a young age, others may have had hangups or negative experiences with sexuality that made them feel they shouldn’t explore it. She has some learning to do, but it’s nothing the rest of us haven’t done (and continue to do…amazing how we can always surprise ourselves). It will probably be easier, at least at first, for her to learn this on her own and probably in private in conjunction with whatever she does with you.

“Male stamina is crucial in women being able to reach higher states of pleasure and orgasm more,” Anami says. In fact, the average man takes anywhere from three to seven minutes to climax, while the average woman requires anywhere from 10 to 20—a discrepancy researchers call “the arousal gap.” How do you close that time frame? Female-focused foreplay is one of the best techniques, because it allows you to start down the excitement path earlier than him, which leads us to…

Use lubricants if needed: For a woman to have multiple orgasms she must be comfortable and find the experience to be pleasurable, more than painful. The vaginal area is extremely sensitive, so if you are going to make love not once or twice, but a couple of times, use a lubricant to lubricate the area. Soreness of the vaginal area will diminish any pleasure and can make intercourse so painful that she may not even reach a single orgasm.

Gentlemen, start her engine. Your challenge is to master the art of the 15-minute orgasm, turning the pre-work fumble or half-time quickie into an explosion that she’s still shuddering from two hours later. It can be done. Sexologists at the Kinsey Institute in the US found that the average woman can orgasm after 10-20 minutes of sex. And aside from the instant spike in your approval ratings, there’s more sex in it for you. Research in the Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy found – somewhat unsurprisingly – that women with an increased likelihood of orgasm demanded more time between the sheets.

From another perspective, the adage that the mind is the most important erogenous organ is totally true. Seduce her imagination, and let her little fantasies and scripts just start doing all that work for you. If she feels turned on and safe with you, she’ll probably start telling you how to get her off.

“We had the rare opportunity to look at responses from over 50,000 people, including over 2,000 gay, lesbian, and bisexual men and women,” said David Frederick, lead author of the research from Chapman University.

This is the kind of information that a man trying to make a woman come needs to know – for example, it is often a better idea for him to give her an orgasm before entering her and enjoying his own orgasm.

Sometimes I think I’m alone in this. I just don’t think it’s that fantastic. I like to be bodily manipulated instead. And fingering. I just don’t cum at all from oral. It’s nice but it’s just not that exciting ever.

“[Going down on a woman] is awesome. Especially when the sexual, physical and spiritual connection is there, it’s like two bodies connecting and expanding into a universe of sensation. It’s just all around awesome.” — Alan*, 33

When you’re with a partner and you feel like the big O just isn’t going to happen, don’t resort to faking it. First of all, if he finds out, he’ll be really hurt. Second of all, that’s not going to help you in the future – if a guy thinks he’s doing the right thing (but he’s actually not), he’s just going to do it again. Instead, instruct him on what to do. Believe it or not, guys love the advice.

13. “I love it when he adds a little finger action in there. It’s like adding toppings to your froyo. Like yeah it’s good without it, but if I can add some peanut butter cups and chocolate chips, hell yeah!” —Amy, 25

If I don’t orgasm within a few minutes, my fiance gets soft and falls asleep. He has implied that it’s too hard to do and takes too long. He loses “steam”. He has a window of opportunity to have sex or he loses interest and his erection. Pressure much? yes. I am a very affectionate and passionate woman and I’m attractive. He says I need more hair down there (no, I don’t shave the main stuff, just what creeps onto the legs). He also says I don’t have a smell…I’m “too clean”. I shower once a day and refuse to let my hygeine go. No fishy smells for me.

According to sexologists at the Masters & Johnson Institute, cunnilingus is the most reliable route to orgasm for 80% of women. Lou Paget, author of The Big O (Piatkus), recommends the Kivin Method as the fastest way of getting there. “With one hand, pull up her clitoral hood,” he says. “Then lick from side to side across its base, just above her clitoris.” Place one finger of the other hand on her perineum (the area directly below the opening of her vagina). When you can feel her pre-orgasmic contractions, you’ll know you’re in the right place.

Every female is different. There is no point in rigidly following those ‘Ten Easy Steps to Give Her an Oral Orgasm’ articles in lads’ mags. It isn’t like an exam, with right and wrong answers. Sometimes you have to experiment to see what works for both of you.

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Performing any sexual act is just as mental as it is physical. Women innately are good at multitasking, so clear your mind because that is going to be your greatest strength for this exercise. Find a comfortable position to do the act. It can be strenuous on the neck so try kneeling in front of him while he either stands or sits down with his legs open. If you’re a little advanced, have him lay flat and you kneel over him.

Let it hang completely loose and flick your tongue independently of any jaw tension. If you cramp up easily, you may have a lot of stored jaw tension that you need to release. To help open that up, check out tip #3 in my article 7 Stretches For Better Sex.

It’s go time! Get your fingers completely out of the area, and maybe do some last-minute kissing while you’re at it too. (Never underestimate the power of a good makeout session.) On your way down, avoid pulling the blankets over your head, because, you know, it tends to get really hot down there.

Talking to your partner about protection before you start having oral sex will help things go more smoothly. This can be embarrassing, but it’s an important part of having sex – and if you find it too difficult to discuss then it could be a sign that you aren’t ready to start having oral sex just yet.

The reason? During intercourse (missionary, doggie, woman-on-top, whatever), the penis does not directly stimulate the clitoris, the organ responsible for women’s orgasms. Sexuality experts reassure couples that the woman’s inability to experience orgasm during intercourse is (1) very common, (2) no reflection on her sexual responsiveness, (3) no reflection on the man’s sexual technique, and (4) no reflection the woman’s feelings about the relationship. I agree.

“For most women, your partner’s hands and mouth are the best tools for helping you peak, so make sure he knows how to use them,” Rose says. Show him exactly how you like to be touched—and then let him explore. (Find out how to Have an Amazing Orgasm: Make Solo Sex Count.) “A lot of women love the combination of oral sex with a few fingers inside. This works for good reason, as this combination allows him to turn on both the external clitoris and it’s internal roots,” Rose suggests. Move his hands to where you touch yourself, and give him audible feedback on what is working for you—right up until you reach your first peak.

How can I give my wife an orgasm by having intercourse? She is not much into foreplay (2 small children not enough time). She prefers missionary style or spooning. She has not been interested in sex lately. It has been over 2 mths. She states that she hasn’t had an orgasm in a year. I know if I can help her orgasm intercourse she would have more sex.  

It’s better to say “I love this!” or something that compliments what’s currently going on. We’re retards and understand everything literally when we focus on other stuff (like eating pussy). A message of “don’t stop” can mean we need to up the tempo etc.

“the best way to make a woman have a orgasim _how to give good oral”

If you’re happy and comfortable with the person you’re with then oral sex can be a great way to get physically closer and learn what turns each other on. But remember that you can pause or stop at any point you want, and the same is true for your partner. Just because you have started something doesn’t mean you need to continue – stopping is actually very normal.

Further analysis of the surveys revealed that women who frequently orgasmed were more likely to have a longer duration of sex and were more likely to have a higher relationship satisfaction, with the study also suggesting that factors such as asking for particular behaviours in bed and flirting with their partner throughout the day were linked to small but significant associations with more frequent orgasms in women.

Don’t forget the power of kisses and caresses: Kisses and caresses go a long way to keep the desire within you at a peak during your lovemaking session. Kissing and caressing your partner makes sure that you both are stimulated enough to move deep into the act. Also read types of kisses – how many have you tried.

thanks to the ladies who’ve already said nix to the “vibrators are bad for women” comment, and seconded/thirded/whatever. especially the bit about how the more women have orgasms, the more able they are to have more in the future. for me anyway, and most of my female friends, it’s like a burner. you can keep it completely switched off as often as you like, and when it’s off, you don’t even think about it. but once you do light it, you can just go and go and go, varying intensity, whatever. you have to light it though first. otherwise it’s totally shut.

In my research for this article, it turns out that a lot of (i.e. the majority) women are used to bad oral sex. One woman I interviewed even said, “With a lot of guys, I’d rather them just not. Some men seem to be absolutely hopeless with oral sex.”

If you don’t have the staying power to keep going with penetrative sex, one answer lies in becoming amazing at oral sex. And you can also spend lots more time on foreplay and focus on finding the best position and movement for your partner so that you can bring that time down.

Some women come easily from any type of stimulation but prefer one orgasm to another. I love receiving oral sex but I find that I enjoy the orgasms I get from sex the best. So once again, it’s better to just ask her what she likes.

Oral sex, like every other thing in life, is a work of passion. You don’t have to love your mister but love his d**k . My motto is: If you’re going to do it, do it right! That means: spit, hands, tongue, lips, breast, a** and those circular weights that hang when he walks! Intimidated? Don’t be…

At this point you can touch the clitoris again, lightly at first with your finger or tongue and then work up the stimulation with an increasingly faster pace and more pressure, until she reaches her peak again.

a vibrator is not the solution cause then your woman experience an clitoral orgasm and not an orgasm through intercourse. order the dvd program penetration orgasm mastery and learn the secrets of penetration orgasm without vibrators but trhough intercourse. 100% money back guaranteed if you are not satisfied.

Sometimes I think I’m alone in this. I just don’t think it’s that fantastic. I like to be bodily manipulated instead. And fingering. I just don’t cum at all from oral. It’s nice but it’s just not that exciting ever.

I try to listen to my wife, other women willing to discuss sexuality, and I read the surveys of women, and what women sex experts write. I don’t claim to “get it” entirely—and have plenty of critics here telling me I don’t—but I try to listen to women and take them seriously.

This one is particularly important for a few of reasons: (1) it has to do with giving a woman oral sex, (2) the advice comes directly from a female, and (3) that expert is an award-winner in her field named Dr. Jess O’Reilly, who dispensed this advice in a recent Reddit AMA.

It’s always good to try new things. I think that getting into a bit of S&M can be a lot of fun. And you’re right in that talking openly and having safe words etc is critical to ensuring you both feel safe to explore that side of your sexuality and enjoy it to the max.

Also known as the Venus Mound, the soft patch of skin above the vulva is the key to orgasm for many women, as sucking, stroking and rubbing this region also massages the shaft of her inner clitoris. While you’re going down on her, use three fingers to gently press upward on the bottom section of her Venus Mound while using her hip movements and breath patterns to guide your rhythm.

Honestly Breve you are thinking way too hard about the situation at hand. Women that can cum vaginally are rare. It just isnt something that all women can due. Try having her stimulate her clit while you are pumping and she will eventually reach her climax. Another thing that is rare but can be achieved is for your women to have multiple orgasms. you simply repeat the process that i just explained. if you can beat my record i would love to hear about. My record is giving my gf 6 orgasms in one 45 minute- 1 hour session. with her playing with her clit each time of course. good luck!!

If you want your man to go down on you, just ask him to. If you feel a bit shy, try getting into bed upside down – he’ll probably get the message. If he really isn’t in the mood, or the idea upsets him, just respect his decision and don’t try to force the issue. There is nothing wrong with having oral sex during a period, but a of men really don’t like doing it at that time of the month.

But many couple wish the woman could come during intercourse. The good news is that there are easy, loving ways to boost women’s chance of orgasm during intercourse. The easiest ways involve the woman-on-top and rear entry (doggie) positions. Orgasm is more challenging in the man-on-top (missionary) position, but a minor adjustment makes it considerably more likely.

Building arousal and experiencing multiple Os in one go is definitely about physical technique (don’t worry, we’ll get there), but first step is setting your thoughts and emotions straight. “Becoming a multiorgasmic woman is a mindset more than anything,” Rose says. (And avoid these 5 Common Libido-Crushers.)

You want her to have an amazing oral orgasm, so build up to the climactic moment and use her whole body. Tell her what you’re going to do so she can anticipate it, but exert full control over how much she gets and when.

And I don’t mean masturbate (yet). There’s a lot going on down there, and you should get to know your body. Sit in front of a mirror and check out what’s happening. The fastest way to masturbate is by stimulating your clitoris, so try to figure out where that is. But I wouldn’t bother looking for the elusive G-spot. Just focus on figuring out what’s what and where everything is.

Even if you decide to give a man oral sex, it doesn’t mean that you have to let him ejaculate (or cum) in your mouth – the choice is yours. Of course, if he’s wearing a condom this won’t be such an issue, and it means you will both be protected against sexually transmitted infections (STIs). It’s also entirely up to you how long you continue for.

“how to get orgasim in woman |tips for going down on a girl”

For her, this really does everything to do with being comfortable, relaxed, and free of anxiety. Every woman has to learn to have orgasms at some point…some of us figured it out independently at a young age, others may have had hangups or negative experiences with sexuality that made them feel they shouldn’t explore it. She has some learning to do, but it’s nothing the rest of us haven’t done (and continue to do…amazing how we can always surprise ourselves). It will probably be easier, at least at first, for her to learn this on her own and probably in private in conjunction with whatever she does with you.

For the former, it’s all about the deep spot, which is sometimes called the A-Spot. Basically you take you middle finger and go all the way back to her cervix. Using just the tip of your middle finger, you press the top of the cervix until she explodes. It works because the cervix contracts during the female orgasm, and so stimulating that contraction causes a very deep full body orgasm that she almost definitely hasn’t experienced before. This is also great for women who can come from the clit but not from penetration. Look up David Shade to learn more about this technique.  If that doesn’t work, hypnosis is the next step.

Me and my girlfriend have been having sex for over five months now and she’s never had an orgasm. I dont seem to understand what is the problem here. She’s had two partners before me and neither have given her an orgasm either. I don’t seem to know whats wrong but what I notice is that she’s never in the mood to do it. I’ve told her again and again to go visit a gynecologist but she’s just too lazy.

I am offended by your terrible advice to watch porn. The majority of women in porn are there against their will. They are victims of sex trafficking. It is not mentally healthy to get off on seeing women being tortured and humiliated. http://stoppornculture.org/

Many women say that oral sex gives them more stimulation than penetration. So remember to take it easy and avoid being rough, especially to begin with. Look where you are too. Gently part the outer lips of the vagina and look for the vaginal opening, and the hooded clitoris above it. These are the most pleasurable areas to stimulate, and are the key to giving the best head. Thrusting a tongue in and out of the vagina might feel good for a moment or two, but it won’t be enough to tip her over the edge.

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Take a short break: That said, don’t leave the bed. If you both have reached your orgasm and plan to continue lovemaking, stay in bed. To revive your energy levels, hug, cuddle, kiss and talk. Remember, lovemaking is not just a physical act and it requires a level of emotional bonding too. Once you’ve reached climax don’t just turn your back on her or flip onto your back; look deep into her eyes and reassure her about how attracted you are to her and how much you cherish your time with her. Do this and odds are you wont need to work too hard to stimulate her for a continued session of love making.

Women can struggle to reach orgasm if they aren’t feeling confident about their bodies or the relationship. In fact, women who are confident that they’ll orgasm are more likely to try a change of tactics if something isn’t working for them. A less confident woman may simply give up without getting her prize.

I try to listen to my wife, other women willing to discuss sexuality, and I read the surveys of women, and what women sex experts write. I don’t claim to “get it” entirely—and have plenty of critics here telling me I don’t—but I try to listen to women and take them seriously.

No matter if you touch it or lick it, one thing is crucial: your PERSISTENCE.  Repeat the same move between her legs continuously and patiently. Make her feel that you won’t stop until she screams with pleasure. She must feel it that it’s fun for you to take care of her and you will not finish in the middle of doing that. She must feel that she is melting with each stroke of your finger or tongue and slowly falling into the deep hole of pleasure.

Sex toys have come a long way since your mother’s dildo (sorry, not a sexy image). Marin suggests trying a couples’ toy like the We-Vibe or, if you prefer going at it alone, the Eva by DAME products, which is an actual hands-free vibrator that stimulates the clitoris with zero effort — yay for that!

When you’re with a partner and you feel like the big O just isn’t going to happen, don’t resort to faking it. First of all, if he finds out, he’ll be really hurt. Second of all, that’s not going to help you in the future – if a guy thinks he’s doing the right thing (but he’s actually not), he’s just going to do it again. Instead, instruct him on what to do. Believe it or not, guys love the advice.

We can give women light, playful orgasms that make the hairs on her skin stand while she giggles and squeals. We can give them deep, full body orgasms that start in her hips and send pulsating waves of pleasure down to her toes and back again.

As we previously reported, the Girls creator underwent a total hysterectomy in an effort to end her longtime battle with endometriosis. While the decision to have her cervix and uterus removed was one she had to make for medical reasons, she’s still struggling with “a broken heart.”

Speaking of conversations, let’s get to the difficult topic of communication during oral sex. So often people struggle to communicate about sex, particularly during sex. But how else will you know if your partner is happy with what is happening? So, in the same way you asked permission initially, now ask your partner if they are enjoying things. You can also ask if they might prefer something different, or if there is any discomfort. Don’t be afraid to gauge your partners pleasure by asking, asking, asking. Most people are very happy to engage with a lover who is so attentive and considerate.

I’m 17 and I can get an orgasm in like ten minutes as all I do is just rub myself and then wet my fingers and the slowly at first rub my clitoris and then kind of build up my speed when it feels right and then it feel good and your fingers automatically just keep going and you don’t want to stop so I hope this helps you kind of get an orgasm

Multi-task. Don’t just have penetrative sex – stimulate her other erogeneous zones as well, simultaneously. I find if my partner is just stimulating my clit, it actually feels too intense. If there’s something else going on I get distracted by that, relax a bit more, and bam!

I’ve been with someone before with a similiar issue. Once she figured it out, it still took us a few months of experimenting to make sex work for her. Oral and manual stimulation on my part were occaisonally successful but in general fairly difficult. Her need was for a very specific kind of stimulation that required very direct feedback.