2. “Make me feel like you’re enjoying it. I’m already thinking this is a chore for you, so if you make me know that you’re doing this because you want to, it’ll help in every way possible.” —Jordan, 27
Unless a woman’s clitoris is close to her vaginal opening, doggy style will just be a fun position for you… while it will feel good for her, without a doubt, it will most likely not provide enough stimulation to make a woman orgasm… at least not anytime soon.
Now, many women say their best orgasms happen courtesy of the man’s tongue or hand or a vibrator. But for women desiring orgasms during intercourse, these simple variations just might allow a woman to enjoy a new erotic pleasure. Happy experimentation. Please comment on your results.
Okay, now you can masturbate. Exploring your own sexuality is one of the best ways to figure out how to orgasm. Masturbating is great for so many reasons – it’s healthy, it will make you feel good and it will teach you more about yourself, just to name a few. Don’t forget to relax and enjoy yourself – it may take a while before you get into the right groove.
Try kissing and licking anywhere between her thighs to turn her on. Move on to the clitoris, starting with gentle licking or sucking. Get her to tell you what motion feels the best, what speed and what pressure turn her on the most. Try it with a relaxed, soft tongue, and change to a firmer, pointed tongue. Some women love an up-and-down licking motion, others like it to go from side to side (like a windscreen wiper), and others still like a circular or pressing-down motion.
The clitoris is the little nub of tissue that sits outside the vagina and a few inches above it beneath the upper junction of the vaginal lips. Even vigorous prolonged intercourse seldom provides enough clitoral stimulation for orgasm. Most women really need clitoral caresses from a hand, tongue, or vibrator. Unless she specifically requests intense touch, caress her clitoris very gently. It contains as many touch-sensitive nerves as the head of the penis, but they’re packed into an organ only about one-tenth the size. As a result, even gentle caresses may feel too intense for many women. Discuss this. If she doesn’t enjoy direct clitoral touch, caress around her clitoris.
Below are some items on how to help a woman get an orgasm. Always note, however, that getting a woman to enjoy sex is not the same thing as getting her to have an orgasm, since women can enjoy other things with sex more than the orgasm. Thus, if a man wants his woman to be happy, it may be more important to provide closeness and love rather than orgasm. Most women are not satisfied if the man enters them too early, but that is not because of lack of orgasm but because of lack of love and intimacy.
One mistake many guys make time and time again is that they often assume oral sex is virtually the same thing as standard intercourse. DO NOT simply thrust your tongue in and out of the vagina as you would with your penis. The tongue does not provide enough friction and is not long or thick enough to make this pleasurable. In general, stick to areas that are easier to access—like the clitoris. The clitoris is a woman’s most sensitive erogenous zone and, when stimulated correctly, leads to mind-blowing orgasms. Tease her for a while by lightly circling it with your tongue. Then try taking it into your mouth and gently sucking on it while softly flicking your tongue over the area—almost like a French kiss.
But because you are flat on the bed, you get very different sensations from any rear-entry position where your bottom is up in the air. And you can slip your hand in between the bed and your body and rub your own clitoris.
Like most things in life, there’s more to the clitoris than meets the eye. It’s more like an iceberg than a button. The little pea-shaped bulb that pops out over top of the vaginal opening is actually just the tip of it. It’s actually more of a wishbone shape, with two shafts that run down either side between her opening and hip creases. Rhythmically massaging this area before or while using your tongue is a great way stimulate blood flow and add to the fullness of sensation.
Wow I have a girl friend that we have good sex . She had started taking some anti de present meds and after that it was impossible to make her come . I tryed a lot and talking some gentle spanks she likes , kissing her pussy , vibraters, bath tub , rubbing my cock all over her .i tryed a lot of new and all the past things she likes . After the med changes !!! All good . Her new doc have her some new mess for hormones inc testosterone . Women girls need that to . Or you may have the wrong partners . Keep it up 🙂 and take your time don’t try to hard or talk yourself onto you never will. Try some adult movies ??? I have no idea about you but I hope I can or have given you some new ideas !!
The difference between people who are good in bed and people who are not isn’t that the people who are good in bed have learned all the techniques or discovered the secret. The people who are good in bed know that everyone is different, so the way you please a person is to listen to that person, talk about that person’s turn-ons and fantasies, and above all else, pay attention to the way that person’s body responds.
You’ve gotta learn how to push her buttons, which is actually really easy when you know know. There’s an awesome guide called Revolutionary Sex that shows you everything and the techniques work so damn good. Here’s the guide: Revolutionary Sex – Give Her The Best Orgasm of Her Life
Women can sustain orgasms of length and intensity that men will simply never know (caveat: men can also become multi-orgasmic with a little bit of effort, but women still get the sweeter end of the stick in terms of orgasmic/peak arousal). So if you’re ignoring it, or are simply uninformed, you’re missing out on a massive treasure chest of sexual experience.
i have been looking up on this for a while as i feel really bad my wife can not orgasam during sex i would love to be able to find her g spot im really good with her clit as this is the only way she can cum. so i have set my self a little task as we are going to a ball this friday and im hoping to try this as she will feel a little more relaxed as she dosent like me fingering her so what i have learnd so far.
This is all great advice but I’m just here to say that none of this will work if you don’t know what she likes. Pay attention to how she masturbates. For example, I will never get off if you go in up and down motions. It HAS to be side to side. And for some reason even after I repeatedly tell my partners what I need and physically move their heads while their down there they can’t fucking get it right. Even after years in relationships. I have only had two orgasms from oral in 10 years of sexual experience and a lot of partners. Because no one listens to me. Just listen to me for the love of God!!!!
– The G-spot. The G-spot is a spongy part of the vagina located on the anterior part of the vagina or the upper part if the woman is lying down. If stimulated properly, it provides the most mind-blowing of all orgasms. However there is no uniform way to stimulate this, and it can vary per person. [Read: How to tingle her G-spot without using a flashlight]
I would like to ADD, it would be great if there was more porn for women, like girl friendly stuff. Dont take the men out of porn but have hotter, younger guys with less body hair and obviously nice looking penises.
For better sex, the website www.massivestayingpower.com may be helpful if you need more information on how to reach orgasm during intercourse, which often depends on the man’s ability to engage in long lasting thrusting.
Although we will never be perfect in accounting for every possible diversity, there is much we can learn from each other that can change the way we interact and communicate our ideas with less potential for discriminatory interpretation and causing heterosexist repercussions, such as those I previously described in my other comment. Speaking to your initial point, it doesn’t matter whether or not the article was written for a majority of heterosexual students. (Does that mean that discrimination is OK as long as you don’t discriminate on the “in-group”/majority group, compared to the “out-group”/minority group?) The actual article is unremarkable to this discussion insofar as there is still a belief that, as you state, “The title…“A Guy’s Guide to Oral Sex”…seems properly worded enough…because that’s what the article is about” continues to be the current position. That is, in fact, not what the article is geared up to be to many people. Therefore, in the context of this discussion and article, it is important to recognize that not only guys give oral sex to women (lesbian women, etc.), and that not all guys that are giving oral sex are giving such to women (gay men, etc.) A more appropriate title would be “Guide to Giving Women Oral Sex” where it does not assume that the person giving oral sex is neither a man, woman, nor anything in between, and does not assume that what is contained in the article is only informative to “guys”. I know quite a few lesbian women that would love to know #1-5!
All the original post does is give their honest advice and then backs it up with evidence they collected, whereas all you have done is wrote some pretty paragraphs your old teachers would be proud of in preschool and decided to be an all round ass nitpicking over terms like some form of grammar nazi mixed in with blind feminism so remember a guide doesn’t always mean a step by step that has to be followed instead of just being a compilation of advice.
Oral sex is an essential part of great foreplay, but can be a full-on sexual experience in its own right. Plus, getting her aroused orally means less pressure on you to last forever during the main event.
In the bottom third of the ellipse is the vaginal entrance. Push the tip of your tongue slightly inside. The walls of the vaginal opening are extremely sensitive, always approach them slowly and gently. The tip of your tongue, being soft and wet, should give her a feeling of pleasure.
Michael Castleman’s articles are always well researched at the same time interesting.I found a few things that i dont know myself as a girl.I am humbled by the rich information found in this page not only in the original post but even in the comments left by few others.
It was once assumed that women didn’t have orgasms, or at least that they were very different from what men experienced. Thankfully, nowadays we know that women have all the equipment required to produce sexual pleasure – and that there’s nothing wrong with enjoying it. Still, most statistics estimate that about 30 percent of women have trouble achieving orgasm.
@Danny, I don’t understand how Austin’s original post merits such a mocking, condescending response. Although I did not have as strong a reaction to this article as Austin did, I understand and sympathize with his argument. Austin’s point may seem overly-sensitive to you, but both of you bring different experiences to your reading. I find it tasteless to attack his criticisms, especially in the dehumanizing way by which you do it.
Deciding whether to have oral sex is a very personal thing. The main things to consider are whether it feels right, and whether you and your partner are both sure. Our article ‘Am I ready for sex?’ will help you think about this.